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Taking Charge
"I think that's a flaw," said Jennifer. "Mandy should be making encouraging remarks all along, just to assure us that she's still on the job. Things like 'You're on the right track' and 'What a smooth ride this is.'""In half a mile, turn right." Mandy was back in the game!
"In 125 yards, turn right. ... In 50 yards, turn right. ... Turn right."
I turned left. I am sometimes susceptible to the same Right Shoe, Left Foot syndrome Quinn suffers from, and in this instance, I put on my left shoe when I needed my right. Mandy was confused. She didn't know where we were and had to ad-lib.
"I've never heard a computer say 'Uhhh ...' before," said Jennifer.
"Let Mandy get her bearings."
"Hannah Montana!"
"Turn left, then right," said Mandy with a forcefulness we'd not known. "Take the second left." I did exactly as I was told and turned right into a Home Depot parking lot.
What she'd meant was the left after Home Depot. This seems to be a growing problem -- idiots like me taking our directives literally. In Germany, a man followed the command "Turn right now" 30 yards before the intended junction. He drove his 4 x 4 onto a building site, up a stairway and into a porta potty. Another guy plowed into a pile of sand on a highway after trusting his GPS more than a Closed for Construction sign.
Getting out of Home Depot was hungry work, so I tapped the NAV's screen until I got to a cool feature -- Points of Interest. Some taps later and, voilà, a list of restaurants in the area appeared. You can also find gas stations, hotels, even a hospital, which was good, since while I was punching away at the tiny keyboard, I almost punched us into the back of a Toyota parked at a red light.
The jury is out on just how safe GPS devices are -- there are no major studies proving one way or the other. But common sense suggests that Mandy telling me where to go saves me from fumbling with cumbersome maps. On the other hand, human nature being what it is, why watch the road when I can watch my progress on the small, colorful screen, or surf the NAV for the area's best French cruller? Other systems offer voice recognition, which means you don't have to tap anything. Simply say in a loud, clear voice, "Find cruller," then Mandy tells you how to get there.
"You have reached your destination," said Mandy, sounding as relieved as we were to pull into my sister's driveway. It took us two hours and 13 minutes, seven minutes longer than if we'd taken the toll routes.
Frankly, a map would've also gotten us to Ithaca, and for $495 less. But I did appreciate how Mandy took charge when I got lost, and who knows, maybe in the future we'll use a GPS for everything. Like finding that golf ball I launched into the forest, showing me how to bypass the scented soaps aisle in the supermarket, or pointing out to this dim father just who Hannah Montana is.
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