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The Oddest Products On the Planet
Filling the minutes between the Happy Days reruns and documentaries about obscure, unpleasant fauna, infomercials lay siege to your brain's pleasure centers, urging you to buy things you never knew you needed. And so you pick up the phone and order now, while supplies last, confident they're not available in any store! And you wind up, as I did, with a living room full of artifacts from late-night TV, everything from the Wonder Washer to the Yoga Booty Ballet DVDs to something called … Tater Mitts.
Some actually deliver on their gaudy promises, some kind of work, and some crumble at the merest touch.
Why would anyone in his right mind clutter his life with this stuff? So that you, dear reader, won't have to. With that in mind, and with the assistance of a small but dedicated cadre of Reader's Digest staffers, I opened my home to some of the oddest products on the planet.
We ranked them on the following scale:
* Don't waste your money
** Works, sort of
*** Good enough to buy
**** Overnight delivery!
So don't touch that remote (or that phone or that credit card) until you read what we have to say.
GO DUSTER
$9.95 **
The promise - The makers of this battery-operated spinning feather duster have gone way out on a limb with an audacious statement: "makes dusting faster, easier, and more fun than you ever imagined!"
The reality - Fun? Well ... yes, actually. "Takes the mundane task of removing dust from blinds, ceiling fans, etc., and makes it an adventure," said one easily amused tester. Although most would like to see an extension pole added for hard-to-reach places, the consensus was "easy to use." But more than one did notice that "it doesn't really remove the dust so much as move the dust around."
HOLLYWOOD PURSE HOOK
$9.95 **
The promise - Instead of slinging your handbag (or umbrella) on any old icky, sticky floor, hang it on this "chic, elegant, and durable hook," says the company. You get a set of two hooks: one with a gold finish, one silver. This portable device uses the weight of the purse as a counterbalance to attach to a table or shelf.
The reality - "It's an unnecessary gadget," said one tester. Added another, "Who cares if it's gold or silver?" But, gushed one martini drinker, "it's perfect for bars!" The obvious flaw of a purse hook: It's one more thing to cram into your purse.
HANDYSWITCH
$14.95 ****
The promise - As if America isn't sedentary enough, the box screams, "Too lazy to get out of bed to turn the lights off? HandySwitch is the amazing remote-control light switch that turns on any lamp in any room!" Plug the receiver into an outlet, and plug the lamp into that. Then use the switch to operate the lamp remotely, from the far end of the room or even outside the house.
The reality - Turns out, our staffers are a bunch of lazy bums. Bum No. 1: "Very handy, especially when walking into a dark house." Bum No. 2: "Excellent for a person with limited mobility." Bum No. 3: "The signal was so strong, it worked two houses away."
WONDER WASHER
$69.95 ***
The promise - Ever wanted to travel the world, just you and your washing machine? Good news! This portable, bucket-sized washer goes where you go, assuming you go to places that have electrical outlets.
The reality - "I like that it agitates, similar to a real washing machine," said one tester. "I think the clothes get a little cleaner than a hand wash would get them." And another raved, "It was great for delicates." A third tester, though, had a better idea. "You could make a bunch of piña coladas in it," she said. "It's basically a giant blender."
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