Infidelity Fears (page 2 of 2)

• Friendship
• Relationships
• Ask Laskas
• Marriage
• Family Life

Family Communication

Question
Are men incapable of listening? My boyfriend has only one ear open -- not just with me. He listens to half of what his parents and friends say and assumes the rest. He gets things wrong all the time, and it drives me crazy! How can I make him see how incredibly rude and inconsiderate this is?
-- Audibly Acute

Dear Acute,
First, start listening to yourself about your own needs. If being with a good listener is important to you, why are you still with this man? As for Mr. Earmuff, try finding some new ways to engage his curiosity. Start with this one: "Would you like to hear what I really think about you?"

Question
I'm 16 and have been raised by a single mother. I get worried every time she brings home a new male "friend." The latest one is an alcoholic, just like the last three. When I try to point out the pattern, my mom says, "So my happiness has to take a backseat to your selfishness?" How can I get her to face reality?
-- Open Eyes

Dear Eyes,
Good for you for getting worried. Above all, pay attention to those alarm bells and make sure you stay safe; don't find yourself alone with your mom's unsavory friends. How can you get her to face reality? You can't. You're 16. She's supposed to be raising you, not the other way around. This situation is screaming out for the influence of a responsible grownup. Talk to an aunt or another trusted adult and explain all. Do not go this one alone.

Question of the Month
A friend broke off her engagement , and it seems to me she is paying a lot of attention to my husband. Perhaps it's unintentional or she means nothing by it, but she finds little ways to touch his shirt or sit closer to him than me, and she recently invited him, not me, over to fix her computer, I trust my husband, but I have a bad feeling. What should I do?
-- Wary Wife

Dear Wary,
Trust him, but trust your instincts too -- and she your intuition with your husband. Ask him if he's beginning to feel ensnared by your friend's neediness. Put him on alert, and stay there yourself. Remind him that you are a team. And definitely go along as a fire wall on the computer job.

From Reader's Digest - December 2006

 

• Beloved Ghost Haunts a Marriage
• You've got questions. She's got answers.
• 
• Underperforming Colleague Wants a Reference
• You've got questions. She's got answers.
• 
• Sister's Parenting Style
• You've got questions. She's got answers.
• 
• Rude Husband
• You've got questions. She's got answers.
•