Mom knew exactly what I was thinking. “Don’t ride that bike with Gabby on the back,” she said. “It’s too dangerous. You could kill yourself. Take turns.”
I nodded, but was thinking, I can handle this.
A few minutes later, I hooked a right on the crescent-shaped road. “Jump on the back,” I told Gabby.
I pedaled furiously as we tore downhill, laughing as the wind whipped through our hair. It was exhilarating, until the handlebar started vibrating and the bike wobbled. The front tire slammed into a drainage ditch and I sailed over the bike, still holding the handlebar.
For a second, I was flying. Then my face, hands, and knees smashed into the pavement.
The pain in my mouth was unbearable, and I tasted blood. I felt around with my tongue and discovered a bloody gap in the front of my mouth. My tooth! I turned towards Gabby who was on the ground, holding her knee and moaning. Once we looked at each other, we started to wail. WAAAAH!!!!!!
Seconds later, it seemed, my mom’s car screeched to a stop next to us.
I wanted Mom to say, “Oh, my poor sweetheart! Let me hug you and everything will be fine.”
Mom slammed the car door.
“What have you done to your face? Vanessa, look what you’ve done!”
Mom wasn’t the huggy, touchy, “I love you, sweetie” type. Sometimes, I thought Mom was being unfeeling. But in her own way, she was holding me tighter than I could understand—she was teaching me the lesson I needed. You did it—deal with it, learn from it. One day, the consequences will be greater and I won’t be there to help you. Figure it out, Vanessa.
You Have No Idea by Vanessa Williams and her mom Helen Williams has just been published.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.