Between the nearly $1,000 chinchilla fur coats and the exponential growth of the organic dog food industry, it’s hard to dispute that this is a dog-obsessed world in which we live. Don’t get me wrong—I have fond memories of my childhood dog, Sadie, our beloved Dachshund that proudly delivered half-dead toads to our back door as if they were rare jewels. But she wasn’t running around in red tartan.
Still, I couldn’t resist this chart I saw on ModernDogmagazine.com that brilliantly matches dog breeds to specific fonts—from the ostentatious and elegant Kunstler (Standard poodle, natch) to the burly, languid Eurostyle (bulldog, prone). Of course, my personal favorite is Fraktur, the unconventional and very German font chosen for the Dachshund (German for “badger dog”). What font would you choose for your pooch?
Photo credit: cllctr.com
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.