When you realize your pet is missing, act fast. That ups your chances of bringing her home, says Kat Albrecht, author of The Lost Pet Chronicles.
- Make it easy. Someone who finds your pup can locate you if the pet has an ID tag. Consider a microchip implant if your pooch often wanders.
- Search high and low. Scared cats tend to hide, so search under cars, in drainpipes and on roofs.
- Create the perfect sign. Include a large color photo and write “reward” (even if you’re only offering a few bucks, mentioning it will help) and “lost dog” or “lost cat.” Include your phone number. Tape signs to telephone poles in a radius of 3-5 blocks for cats (3-5 miles for dogs), high enough for drivers to see.
- Call the experts. Check with animal shelters. Sadly, many pets are killed in traffic, so call local highway and animal control departments and ask if anyone has found a body that could be your pet. Find more tips at lostapet.org.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.