10 Foods Not to Order on a First Date

View as Slideshow

© Creatas/Thinkstoc
Spaghetti and meatballs: Let’s be honest, the date is not going to turn out like Lady and the Tramp. Instead, it’s more likely to end up like Lady and the Spaghetti Sauce in Her Lap.

© iStockphoto/Thinkstock
Hamburgers bigger than your mouth: It won’t be pretty to watch.

© Stockbyte/Valueline/Thinkstock
Spicy foods: If you need to use your napkin as a sweat rag, the meal is too spicy for a date.

© Photodisc/Thinkstock
Soup: Slurping sounds are not romantic.
Content continues below ad

© Hemera Technologies/AbleStock.com/Thinkstock
Dollar menu: If you’re going to take your date to a fast-food joint for Valentine’s Day, at least make it romantic and super-size it.

© iStockphoto/Thinkstock
Beans: The more you eat them the more you… enough said.

© Hemera/Thinkstock
Whole lobster/crab: This one is from personal experience. It’s hard to look at someone romantically while they are ripping apart a creature from the bottom of the sea with their bare hands.

© Hemera/Thinkstock
Spinach: It will end up stuck in your teeth.
Content continues below ad

© iStockphoto/Thinkstock
Garlic bread: Unless, of course, your date is eating it as well.

© iStockphoto/Thinkstock
Wings and ribs: Any menu item that comes with a Wet Nap should be avoided at all costs.

Become more interesting every week!

Get our Read Up newsletter

how we use your e-mail

Some people like to travel by train because 
it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of 
an airplane.

Dennis Miller

I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”

Kevin Nealon

“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” 
—Everyone following you on Instagram


A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.

Comedian Greg Davies

Funny Jokes

Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.


Funny Jokes

Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.

From clientsfromhell.net

Funny Jokes

My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me 
everything you know.”


Funny Jokes

“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” 

@yoyoha (Josh Hara)

Funny Jokes

My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.

—Jerry Seinfeld

Funny Jokes

Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?

A: A mechanic.