Married on a dare? Here, you can take it back.
If you like it, then you should've put a ring on it.
Put those pajamas back on. Please.
You got a permission slip for those dentures, lady?
Here, you'd better be nice to your mother-in-law.
Ready, aim, fire!
Drunk? (Or just stupid?) Sober up before you say "I do."
Fourth time? Not a charm.
Here, kissing cousins can legally marry.
Sorry, Miss Cleo can't pronounce you man and wife in this town.
Here, you could've gotten married before you could play scratch-off lottery.
I love you, wherever you are.
No PDA on the Lord's Day.
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.