Step 1: Clasp his hand as if to arm-wrestle. Pull him toward you.
Step 2: Quickly turn your face 45 degrees to the left. He should do the same.
Step 3: Give him at most three hearty pats on the back, as if you’re burping a baby. Keep all body contact above the waist.
Step 4: Push back, release your grip, smile with embarrassment, and pretend it never happened.
See also: Please Don’t Hug Me
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
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@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.