1. Let your city take care of it
Municipalities often entertain their residents for free, especially over the summer – mostly free concerts but also free dance lessons and more. Your city should have an events calendar with details — find yours by Google-searching: “[City or county name] + calendar of events.”
2. Get some exercise
Stroll the nearby wilderness together at a local nature preserve or park. If you’re more comfortable hanging out first among friends, reserve a field for a pickup game of softball or soccer. Don’t know where to go? Look up your city’s Parks and Recreation Department website for ideas.
3. Sit under the stars
Hey, it’s summer. Grab a $10 bottle of wine and sit outside with your date under the stars, staring at the natural (or, if you live in a big city, man-made) beauty of the night. This is a good time to steal that first kiss, especially under a full moon.
4. Drip drop
Take your date and lose yourself in the hypnotizing effects of reflective water. It shouldn’t be too hard to find public access to these, and they’re always free.
Do you and the object of your affection have dogs? Take them for a walk together or to a dog-friendly park. To find your local dog park, just search for it on your city’s website – some even have entire sites devoted to their dog parks, like New Orleans. And don’t forget to bring bags to pick up after your pet. Nothing is more unattractive than a dog-owner who doesn’t.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.