BODY: Dyson vacuums (starting at $200) are built from the same high-impact-resistant materials used in crash helmets and riot shields, and they are rigorously tested to verify their durability: During development, cleaners are dropped onto floors 5,318 times to certify they can withstand ten years of use.
MOTOR: Don’t get confused by cleaners that advertise high amps (which indicate the vacuum’s electricity consumption). Instead of a cleaner carpet, you might just wind up with a larger electric bill.
FILTERS: Sealed HEPA filters are the most effective at trapping allergens. They cost about $25 and provide the same filtration as many pricey anti-allergenic machines.
NOZZLE/SUCTION: Intelligence is expensive. A special sensor on the Sebo Automatic X4 vacuum ($679) automatically adjusts the machine to the appropriate cleaning height for each surface (like hardwood or carpeting). For $100, you can get the Hoover WindTunnel with a manual dial that does exactly the same thing.
CANISTER: Cheaper bagged cleaners like the Dirt Devil Breeze Lightweight ($70) are actually more dependable than fancier bagless models. The bag protects the motor from large particles that would otherwise circulate freely inside the machine, damage the motor, and diminish its life span.
POWER CABLE: Dyson engineers unwind and rewind a cleaner’s cable 6,400 times to make sure it won’t kink or break.
BUMPER: The S 8990 UniQ canister vacuum cleaner from Miele takes its design (and price) cues from luxury cars: Features like a velvet bumper, mahogany-colored metallic finish, and underbody lights for cleaning in dark areas will cost you $1,500.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.