39 More Secrets Your HR Person Won’t Tell You

HR professionals reveal their insider secrets.

By Michelle Crouch

1. “The No. 1 thing in job security is your relationship with your boss. Even if he says, ‘I’m sorry I really wanted to keep you, but they made me lay you off,’ that’s almost never true. He probably made that decision.” –Cynthia Shapiro, former human resource executive and author of “Corporate Confidential: 50 Secrets Your Company Doesn’t Want You to Know.

2. “If you’re accused of sexual harassment, even if you’re found to be not guilty, people will always look at you funny afterwards. It can kill your career.” –Laurie Ruettimann, HR consultant and speaker in Raleigh, N.C .

3. “Even in jobs where you test applicants and those with the top scores are supposed to get the job, I’ve seen hiring managers fix scores to get the people they like.” –HR representative in the manufacturing industry.

4. “If you have a question, come to my office. Don’t corner me in the bathroom.” –HR professional at a mid-sized firm in North Carolina

5. “Children and hobbies do not belong on a résumé. And never, ever say, ‘Now that my kids are in college, I’m ready to get back in the workforce.’ ” –HR professional at a mid-sized firm in North Carolina

6. “Someone might tell you to ‘Be yourself’ in the interview. Don’t be yourself. That’s the worst advice ever. We don’t want people who are neurotic and quirky and whatever else. All we care about is your skill and experience.” –Laurie Ruettimann, HR consultant and speaker in Raleigh, N.C.

7. “You’re right to be paranoid. The company is always watching you, and there’s a record of everything you do: every phone call, every text, every tweet and instant message. At most companies, they save that data forever.” –Laurie Ruettimann, HR consultant and speaker in Raleigh, N.C

8. “I was asked by one CEO to hire the long-legged girl with the long dark hair even though she didn’t have the right skills. Another time, I was instructed not to hire anyone with children because the company had too many people leaving for soccer games. That kind of thing happens all the time.” –Cynthia Shapiro

9. “I know many of you met your former spouse at the company. But the thing is, for every one of you, there are five people it doesn’t work out as well for. And your office romance can and will be held against you.” –Kris Dunn, chief human resources officer at Atlanta-based Kinetix who blogs at HRcapitalist.com.

10. “Many people think, ‘If I work extra hard, I’m going to get noticed.’ But it doesn’t work that way. If you want to advance, some of the responsibility falls on you to toot your own horn. Make sure your supervisor and your supervisor’s supervisor are well of aware of what you’re contributing.” –Michael Slade, HR director at Eric Mower and Associates, an integrated marketing communications agency.

11. “I know a lot more about you when you walk in the door than you realize. I’ll search for you on the web and often use my own personal network to do a pre-interview reference check.” –Senior HR Executive in New York City

12. “Generally speaking, you only put someone on paid leave if you’re pretty certain that they might be terminated from the company once you do your investigation.” –Kris Dunn

13. “Never accept the job immediately. Say you need to think about it overnight. Once you sign on the dotted line there’s no room for negotiation.” –A human resources professional in New York City

14. “If you get fired, don’t just stomp out and go on with your life. The company may be willing to give you some severance, especially if you can point to someone different from you who didn’t get as severe a punishment. Just saying, ‘Well, I talked to my attorney’ (even if you don’t have an attorney) can also give you some leverage.’” –Suzanne Lucas, a former HR executive and the  “Evil HR lady” on bnet.com

15. “If we ask ‘What salary are you looking for?’ say you’re flexible, or say it depends on the responsibilities of the job. Try not to name a salary unless we really push you, because that gives us a leg up in the negotiating.” –A human resources professional in New York City

16. “I’ve always hated the big United Way drive at work.  Not because of the United Way.  Great organization.  Because of the smell of solicitation in the air, and because we are usually in the middle of it.” –Kris Dunn

17. “Companies do have black lists. It’s not written down anywhere but it’s a list of people they’d be happy to get rid of if the opportunity arises. If you feel invisible, if you’re getting bad assignments, if your boss is ignoring you, or if they move your office, you’re probably on it.” –Cynthia Shapiro

18. “I may say ‘I’m terminating you because you didn’t meet performance measures.’ I’m not going to say it’s because you’re a pain in the butt and piss people off every time you interact with them.’” –HR Manager at a healthcare facility

19. “I once had someone send me Forget-me-not seeds with their thank you note. Yes, thank me for taking the time, that’s great. But sending me seeds? That’s weird.” –Sharlyn Lauby, human resources consultant in Fort Lauderdale, Fla.

20. “Don’t lie about your salary. Ever. Even if your employer doesn’t tell us (and most do), we’ll find out eventually. I’ve terminated two people for doing that.” –A human resources professional in New York City

21. “One time a candidate sent – I love this – a thank you card with a professional picture of herself, which quite honestly became the running joke for weeks. The picture was blown up and posted in my office with hearts drawn around it.” –HR director at a financial services firm

22. “Don’t ever tell me that you have to have this job because you’re going to lose your house, your kids have nothing to eat, your mother has cancer. Companies aren’t a charity.” –Suzanne Lucas

23. “Networking does not mean using Facebook or Linked In. It means going to events, getting your face in front of people and setting up informational interviews.” –A human resources professional in New York City

24. “We get résumés on fancy schmantzy papers. We get them with gold-pressed lettering. We get them in binders and in document protectors with ribbons. None of that sways me.” –HR Manager in St. Cloud, Minnesota

25. “98 percent of the résumés we receive when we post a position on a big jobs site like hotjobs, monster or careerbuilder are junk, people who are nowhere near qualified. We’ll get a guy who’s a bar manager applying for a director of public affairs position. Or a shoe salesman. That’s why we like posting jobs on websites that target specific industries.” –Michael Slade, HR director at Eric Mower and Associates, an integrated marketing communications agency.

26. “Your job isn’t safe just because you’re pregnant or a new mom. Lots of people get pink slips while they’re on maternity leave. Companies can do it as part of a larger layoff, include you in there and create a justification for it.” –Cynthia Shapiro

27. “Some companies do everybody’s raises on their anniversary dates. I’m not a fan of that because if the budget comes out in January, those poor people hired in December get, ‘Oh sorry, we’d like to give you more but we gave a huge increase to Bob so you’re just going to get 2 percent.’” –Suzanne Lucas

28. “I don’t lay people off at the end of the day because I think it’s rotten to get a whole workday out of someone, then lay them off. I always lay them off in the morning.” –A human resources professional in New York City

29. “I had somebody list their prison time as a job. And an exotic dancer who called herself a ‘customer service representative.’ ” –Sharlyn Lauby, human resources consultant in Fort Lauderdale, Fla.

30. “It doesn’t take 40 hours a week to look for a job. So if you’re unemployed, do something: take classes, meet people, go to industry meetings, start a blog, read a book a week. Just don’t sit on the couch and eat Doritos.” –Ben Eubanks, HR professional in Alabama

31. “My Linked In profile is for myself, a way for me to find another job. It’s not a way to find a job with me.” –A human resources professional in New York City

32. “In interviews, everyone works well with others, and everyone learns quickly. Please tell me something else.” –HR manager in St. Cloud, Minn.

33. “I’ve seen managers not hire a woman because the environment is mostly male, and they’re worried that no matter how smart or talented she is, she won’t fit in.” –HR representative at a Fortune 500 financial services firm

34. “If it’s been a week or two and I tell you ‘I don’t have an update yet,’ that often means there’s a better candidate we’re talking to, but we can’t tell you that in case they decide not to take the job.” –Recruiting consultant Rich DeMatteo. Philadelphia, Pa.

35. “If you call to check on the status of your résumé  and I ask, ‘What job did you apply for?’’ If you don’t know, you’re done.” –HR professional at a mid-sized firm in North Carolina

36. “When we had someone go out on disability and we knew he was faking it, we didn’t want to go to court to prove it. So we put him on the end of the assembly line in a job where we knew he wouldn’t succeed. Eventually, we were able to fire him.” –HR pro at a mid-level staffing firm

37. “I have better things to do than deal with who slept with who, or who’s talking about you behind your back. Sometimes I feel like a high school guidance counselor.” –HR professional at a mid-sized firm in North Carolina

38. “Yes, I have access to everyone’s salary but I don’t look unless I have to. There’s nothing worse than having to reprimand someone, and then seeing they make $60,000 more than me.” –HR professional at a midsize firm in North Carolina

39. “Don’t stalk me.” –A human resources professional in New York City

Plus: Surprising Field Where Job Opportunities Abound What Job Will You Be Most Successful At? Your Contribution Style Will Tell

Become more interesting every week!

Get our Read Up newsletter

Sending Message
how we use your e-mail

  • Your Comments

    • vera

      i want to give thanks and i will always give thanks to DR.agbadi who brought back my love that has left me for 6years within 48hours, i have said about this last week but i promised to always tell people about this every week end so that those that did not read about it last week will read about it this week, i have been looking for how to get this boy back to my life because i love this boy with the whole of my heart, i could not replace him with any body,one day i was watching my television when i saw a lady giving thanks to DR.agbadi and telling the world how he helped her i was so shocked i could not believe it because i never taught that there are powers that can bring back lost love, then that was how i decided to contact him too because i do really need my love back,when i contacted him i told him everything and he told me not to worry that my love will surely be back to my arms within 48hours at first i could not believe because i was thinking how could somebody that has gone for 6years come back within 48 hours,so then i decided to watch and see,unbelievable within the next 48hours i got a call from unknown number so i decided to pick the call the next thing i could hear was my loves voice he was pleading and begging me on the phone that i should forgive him that i should forget all that have happened that he did not know what came over him,he promised not to leave for any reason, that he was really sorry for what he did,i was so surprised because i never believed that this could happen,so that was how i accepted his apology and the next morning he came to my house and still pleading for me to forgive him i told him that everything is okay that i have forgiven him, that was how we started again and now we are married, i promised to say this testimony in radio station, commenting this testimony is still okay but before this month runs out i promise to say this in radio station and i will,sir thank you very much.World please am begging you people to try and thank this man for me,or if you need his help here is his email address:dragbadilaguspelltemple@gmail.com or you can also reach him through his mobile number,+2347067607812

    • vera

      Oh my God, I’m so glad to tell everyone the real thing that happen to

      me…My name is JOAN. If i refuse to share this testimony it means i am

      selfish to my self and to people i love so much whom might have similar

      problems, March 16th about something 7:23pm after taken our dinner my

      husband got crazy started calling a lady name Melisa I love you, i was

      so mad and started crying like a baby…then my husband left home then

      for the idiot called Melisa, and never return back home then i believed

      when he understand his self he will surly come back to apology, but

      instead he left me So i complained to my friend she told me she was

      having such problems in her marriage until she was introduce to DR

      agbadi who specializes in bringing back broken homes and broken

      marriages DR agbadi cast a spell for me in May 4th surprisingly my

      husband came home May 6th apologizing that i should forgive him that it

      will never happen again, i was so glad and gave the thanks to DR ZONA

      who save my marriage, if you are having similar problem you can contact

      him and His email address is (dragbadilaguspelltemple@gmail.com) you

      can still save your marriage if u really love your husband.
      Thanks joan

    • Sandra Able

      Hello i am sandra ,I am out here to spreed this good news to the entire world on how i got my ex love back.I was going crazy when my love left me for another girl last month,But when i meet a friend that introduce me to dr.ekumabor the great messenger to the God’s that he serve,I narrated my problem to dr.ekumabor about how my ex love left me and also how i needed to get a job in a very big company.He only said to me that i have come to the right place were i will be getting my heart desire without any side effect.He told me what i need to do,After it was been done,In the next 2 days,My love called me on the phone and was saying sorry for living me before now and also in the next one week after my love called me to be pleading for forgiveness,I was called for interview in my desired company were i needed to work as the managing director..I am so happy and overwhelmed that i have to tell this to the entire world to contact dr.ekumabor at the following email address and get all y
      our problem solve..No problem is too big for him to solve..Contact him direct on: dr.ekumaborspellhome@gmail.com and get your problems solve like me…………

    • Robert Caston

      With so much in my heart i am here to express myself on how Dr.dele saved my marriage from breaking up. Myself and my husband were having some misunderstanding and it was tearing our marriage apart to the extend my husband was seeking for a divorce. So i have no option than to go to the internet to seek for solution to my problem it was there i came across Dr.dele details and about how he has helped a lot of people by restoring there relationship. I contact Dr.dele and in less than 48 hours my husband cancelled the divorce papers. Now myself and my husband live together in peace and harmony all thanks to Dr.dele for saving my marriage from breaking up. Dr.dele contact information are via email on Delespellhome@yahoo.com

    • George

      All my thanks to the great Dr Zack Balo who helped me bring the love of my life back within 3days. i have never see any spell that work so fast like the one which he cast for me. i am saying this to those who are willing to do anything to get their ex back to contact this great man Dr Zack Balo on his email address wiseindividualspell@gmail.com or call him on +2348078927387

    • vivian

      I NEVER BELIEVED IN LOVE SPELLS UNTIL I MET THIS WORLD’S TOP SPELL CASTER. HE IS REALLY POWERFUL AND COULD HELP CAST SPELLS TO BRING BACK ONE’S GONE,LOST,MISBEHAVING LOVER AND MAGIC MONEY SPELL OR SPELL FOR A GOOD JOB.I’M NOW HAPPY & A LIVING TESTIMONY COS THE WOMAN I HAD WANTED TO MARRY LEFT ME 2 WEEKS BEFORE OUR WEDDING AND MY LIFE WAS UPSIDE DOWN COS OUR RELATIONSHIP HAS BEEN ON FOR 2YEARS… I REALLY LOVED HIM, BUT HIS MOTHER WAS AGAINST US AND HE HAD NO GOOD PAYING JOB. SO WHEN I MET THIS SPELL CASTER, I TOLD HIM WHAT HAPPENED AND EXPLAINED THE SITUATION OF THINGS TO HIM..AT FIRST I WAS UNDECIDED,SKEPTICAL AND DOUBTFUL, BUT I JUST GAVE IT A TRY. AND IN 7 DAYS WHEN I RETURNED TO USA, MY GIRLFRIEND(NOW WIFE) CALLED ME BY HERSELF AND CAME TO ME APOLOGIZING THAT EVERYTHING HAD BEEN SETTLED WITH HIS MOM AND FAMILY AND SHE GOT A NEW JOB INTERVIEW SO WE SHOULD GET MARRIED..I DIDN’T BELIEVE IT COS THE SPELL CASTER ONLY ASKED FOR MY NAME AND MY GIRLFRIENDS NAME AND ALL I WANTED HIM TO DO… WELL WE ARE HAPPILY MARRIED NOW AND WE ARE EXPECTING OUR LITTLE KID,AND MY WIFE ALSO GOT THE NEW JOB AND OUR LIVES BECAME MUCH BETTER. IN CASE ANYONE NEEDS THE SPELL CASTER FOR SOME HELP, HIS EMAIL ADDRESS IS;okutemple@hotmail.com ……HOPE HE HELPS YOU OUT OUR OPPORTUNITY … CONTACT THIS GREAT SPELL CASTER VIA EMAIL:okutemple@hotmail.com

    • Melisa

      I want to say that my lover left me in April. During one long month I have contacted many casters and bought almost ten spells without results. My ex wouldn’t contact me, wouldn’t answer my calls and emails. But I never lost hope because I knew we were soul mates. Dr. Abu cast the most wonderful spell for me 2 weeks ago and everything has changed since then. We are close to each other again and he is calling me many times everyday. Thank you Dr. Abu of Ominighospelltemple@gmail.com, your help is very appreciated! I will keep in touch.

    • CLARA

      *
      who will believe that a spell will being back six years divorce,my name is
      CLARA am from USA, it all happen when i was about to give birth to my first
      child, when my husband left me because of another girl, then i think the
      world has come to an end because he was always man at me any time i called,
      and i don’t want to bring up a child without a father, i did all a could
      but there was not hope, the more i try the more everything get complicating
      i was so confuse, one day i went through the internet i saw a testimony
      writing by someone how DR RAMAN help him get his ex back i follow up, after
      the spell casting my husband came back begging for forgiveness today we
      have three more children, to me we are the best couple in town, please if
      you need his help contact him with his email, ramansolutiontemple@gmail.com
      thank you DR RAMAN for your good work GOD will bless you for me.once again
      his email address is ramansolutiontemple@gmail.com
      God bless you with your good work DR.
      *

    • vivian

      My boyfriend and I were happy as far as I could tell and I never thought that we would break up. When his cousin died in a tragic car accident he went back to Philippine for a week to be with his family. I could not go because I was in the middle of entertaining out of town clients for work. He did not seem to be upset that I could not go so I let him be. The next thing that I know, he reconnected with an old friend from high school that he had a crush on years ago and they started to have an affair! I had no clue what was going on until a month after he came back from Philippine.He proceeded to see both her and I until I caught him testing her one night. I confronted him and he told me the truth about what happened. We broke up and went our separate ways. Neither of us fought for our relationship. I was angry and decided not to be upset about it and just keep it moving. Then after about a month of not speaking to him I became sad. I wanted him to tell me that he wanted to be with me and not her. I contacted Dr.Papa from supremetemple@hotmail.com for a love spell and he totally helped me! he was able to get him to miss me to where he wanted to get back together again. He had a lot of regrets and felt bad for not fighting to keep me and for cheating in general. He values our relationship so much more now and we are together now! You can also get your lover back with the help of Dr. Papa contact him through supremetemple@hotmail.com

    • Kite Monica

      my boyfriend of two years let me for another girl because i accuse him of seen another girl and since then i have been trying to get him but he refuse to come back to me,he was not responding to my call or email and he even unfriend me in facebook and he told me that he is done with me.i was searching on the internet for help and i saw a testimony of how a spell caster help them to get their ex back so i decided to give it a try and i contacted him and i explain my problems to him and he cast a love spell for me and guarantee me of 2days that my ex will come back to me and to my greatest surprise the third day a great miracle fell on me and my ex come back to me on the two days and he beg me for forgivenes, i will continue to publish his name because he is my Savior and we are about to get married.if you need him to help you Email ogalalovespell@gmail.com