Lifehacker.com asked readers which e-mail phrases they’d like to see banished—or at least improved. A selection:
1. “We need to …” “Translation: XYZ needs to be done, but … I’m not actually going to come out and directly tell any of you to do it.”
2. “Cheers”— “especially when used outside British pubs or the U.K. in general.”
3. “Thanks in advance“—”as opposed to thanks from the past?”
4. “Touch base.”
5. “Circle back.”
6. “To be honest.”
7. The worst: “Please consider the environment before printing this e-mail.” “I’ll print it if I need to, whether you nag me or not!”
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.