Are you looking for a new line of work? You could do worse than taking a cue from the folks at Downtown Abbey. PBS.org posted a quiz for you to take to see which Downtown Abbey job is right for you. I answered the 10 questions, and it turns out my mentor is Isobel Crawley, the philanthropic do-gooder. Frankly, I didn’t want to settle for anything less than lord, but I suppose it’s better than being the chamber pot maid, or whatever that particular job is called. Here’s what I was told:
“Roll up your sleeves and prepare to get dirty (this is my kind of job already!), because Isobel’s charitable jobs are right for you (frankly, I’m a big believer in getting paid, and the more the merrier). Your hands-on work for those who need it the most (does this mean I’m a chiropractor?) can get you into trouble (my past haunts me!), especially when you cross the line from leader to bossypants (how did they know the kind of trousers I prefer?) But while your values or methods may not make you popular (Wait, what?!), your heart is in the right place (It’s true. I just got back from the doctor’s). And you back it up with considerable force of will.”
Take the test and find out whether you belong upstairs or downstairs.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.