I have been in many places, but I’ve never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can’t go alone—you have to be in Cahoots with someone. I’ve also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there. I have,however, been in Sane. You have to be driven there, and I’ve made several trips, thanks to family, friends, and work.
I’d like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I’m not much into physical activity anymore. I have also been in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often. I’ve been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm. Sometimes I’m in Capable, and I go there more often as I get older. One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense!It really gets the adrenaline flowing and the old heart pumping!
And sometimes I think I am in Vincible, but lifeshows me I’m not. I have been in Deepdoodoo frequently. And the more adventurous I get, the easier it is to end up there.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.