Inside the Comic Mind

Andy Haynes getting a lift from a fellow comic prior to his Conan debut.

One of the roughest years of my life was the day I took to the stage to perform a comedy routine. It was the culmination of a stand-up comedy class I took for an article I was writing. To put it mildly, I bombed. My friend Mitch was on hand to watch the debacle, and here was our conversation following my act:

Mitch: You were awful. Just terrible. Your act was amateurish. There were no laughs. Nothing redeeming whatsoever.

Andy: And?

Mitch: And you’re the worst comic I’ve ever seen. The rabbi at my mother’s funeral had better material than you.

Andy: So what you’re saying is, my act requires a bit of refinement.

Mitch: Yes. If you can refine yourself and your jokes out of your act and leave just a bare stage, the act would be improved immeasurably.

I took Mitch’s advice. After all, comedy is not for the feeble. Filmmaker Scott Moran knows that. In a series of behind-the-scenes videos called Modern Comedian, Moran follows and interviews comics to see what makes them tick. Episode Six, the most interesting, is dedicated to comic Andy Haynes as he prepares a routine for his biggest show ever—six minutes on Conan O’Brien. Moran shows how he edits his act and decides what jokes stay in and which ones get the boot.

Language alert! There is one “bleepable” word uttered.


Keep the laughs coming every week!

Get our hilarious Funny Reads newsletter

how we use your e-mail

Some people like to travel by train because 
it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of 
an airplane.

Dennis Miller

I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”

Kevin Nealon

“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” 
—Everyone following you on Instagram


A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.

Comedian Greg Davies

Funny Jokes

Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.


Funny Jokes

Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.


Funny Jokes

My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me 
everything you know.”


Funny Jokes

“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” 

@yoyoha (Josh Hara)

Funny Jokes

My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.

—Jerry Seinfeld

Funny Jokes

Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?

A: A mechanic.