The Funny Art of Complaining

Feel aggrieved? Don’t stew. Raise a stink! These people did.

By Andy Simmons | Reader's Digest Magazine

the Funny Art of ComplainingI don’t mean to complain, but … OK, actually, I do. And I’m not alone. We all do it. And our gripes can get so ugly that we describe the very act as “venting one’s spleen.” Such is the world today that we will whine about anything (“Ugh … Why does global warming always happen to me?!”). Just like every other creature that roams the earth (“Why does Earth have to be so muddy?!”), whiners come in different shapes, sizes, and attitudes. See if you recognize yourself in any of the following descriptions..

Impossible to Please
A man who robbed a Wendy’s in Atlanta was so put off by his skimpy haul that he called the restaurant twice to voice his disapproval. That’s better than what police say Arthur Bundrage did. Bundrage approached a Syracuse, New York, bank teller and demanded $20,000. When he got home, he discovered he’d been shortchanged. Outraged, he stormed back to the bank to tell them what he thought of their service. That’s when he was arrested.
—Source: Associated Press

Easily Offended
For all the money spent on vacations, is it too much to expect perfection? These travelers didn’t think so. Here’s a taste of what they told their travel agents:

  • “On my holiday to India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don’t like spicy food at all.”
  • A guest at a Novotel in Australia complained that his soup was too thick. He was inadvertently slurping gravy.
  • Following a trip to a national theme park, one angry woman complained that the sun was so hot it melted her ice cream.
  • An air traveler voiced her disapproval of all the clouds in the sky, saying they ruined her children’s game of Eye Spy.

—Source: Toronto Star, telegraph.co.uk

Snidely Whiplash
An unimpressed guest sent this missive to a British hotel regarding its decor:

“The ’70s style really is making a comeback, isn’t it? The fact that yours is actually original gives the place that touch of authenticity … The lighting was also very good—and bright. No point in having a great interior if it’s too dark to see it, and you never know when you might have to indulge in a bit of complex cardiothoracic surgery, so it’s better to be safe than sorry, I say.”

Next: Richard Branson gets slammed with a zero-star review

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