There’s a museum for just about everything. If you like your wire as barbed as your wit, check out the Devil’s Rope Museum’s barbed wire collection in McLean, Texas. If you find yourself trying to satisfy a sweet tooth in Burlingame, California, stop off at the Museum of Pez Memorabilia. And while you’re on the West Coast, check out Rancho Obi-Wan dedicated to Star Wars memorabilia.
If you can’t make it there, don’t despair. Just pick up a copy of Star Wars: The Ultimate Action Figure Collection by Stephen J. Sansweet (Chronicle Books, $40). It includes shots of hundreds of nifty action figures (don’t call them dolls!) from the first film to the last. It’s a nerd’s dream come true!
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.