1. Hide wrinkles with a bright smile.
Discolored, stained, or simply dull-looking teeth can add years to your smile–and your face. Invest in an over-the-counter tooth-whitening kit for a brighter smile, or see your dentist.
2. Hide wrinkles with a great haircut.
Now’s the time for a flattering new style. Ask the stylist about color choices, too. If you’ve never had highlights, consider adding them; they give dimension to colored hair.
3. Hide wrinkles with new eyebrows.
The right eyebrow shape can change your face almost as radically as a face-lift. Make an appointment to have your brows waxed or plucked at a good local salon (ask your friends for a recommendation). Then return for touchups or buy a good pair of tweezers and follow the contours to maintain your new shape.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.