Q: I’ve tried everything and I’m still seriously overweight. I’m considering bariatric surgery. What do I need to know before making this decision?
A: Many people think of weight-loss surgery as a moral defeat: It’s unnatural and it’s cutting corners. But for those with life-threatening obesity — a body mass index of 40 or higher, or 35 or higher with side effects like diabetes and high blood pressure — surgery could be the best choice.
If you’re part of this group, and if you’ve repeatedly tried diet and exercise without results, here’s what you need to know: This is major surgery that has risks (blood clots, infection) as well as rewards (a thinner, longer life). Most of all, you must commit to changing your postoperative lifestyle: You know, eating healthy foods and exercising regularly. Follow that, and it’ll be an effective procedure that will do more than improve your looks. It will improve your health — drastically.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
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@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.