Q: I don’t have much time to work out. When I do, should I focus on cardio, strength training, yoga or something else?
A: Even if you’re busier than a tollbooth collector on Labor Day weekend, you can still benefit from short sweat sessions. Above all, strengthen your muscles and increase your metabolism, as muscle burns more calories than fat. Try doing resistance moves that don’t require equipment: push-ups for your upper body, crunches for your abs, and the invisible chair for your legs and butt (squat with your back against a wall; hold the position for up to two minutes). For a 20-minute workout that combines strength, stretching and cardiovascular training, visit realage.com. For maximum health benefits, include 30 minutes a day of walking. No time? Work three 10-minute sessions into your life: Park farther away at work, buy a headset and walk in circles while you’re on the phone, or take Brutus for two loops around the block.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.