Open shrink-wrapped DVDs
Opening shrink-wrap, especially on DVDs, can be a test of skill and patience! Save your fingernails and teeth from destruction. Twist out the end of a paper clip and slice the wrap. To prevent scratches, slip the clip under the folded section of wrap and lift up.
Use as hooks for hanging
Paper clips make great impromptu hooks. Making a hanging ceramic plaque? Insert a large, sturdy paper clip on the back before the clay hardens.
Hold the end of transparent tape
Got a roll of transparent tape without a dispenser? Don’t drive yourself nuts trying to locate and lift the end of the tape. Stick a paper clip under the end the next time you use the roll.
Make a bookmark
Paper clips make great bookmarks because they don’t fall out. A piece of ribbon or colorful string attached to the clip will make it even easier to use and find.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
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A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
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@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.