Get wax off wood furniture
It may have been a romantic evening, but that hardened candle wax on your wooden table or bureau is not the sort of lingering memory you had in mind. Melt it with a blow-dryer on its slowest, hottest setting. Remove the softened wax with a paper towel, then wipe the area with a cloth dipped in equal parts vinegar and water. Repeat if necessary. You can also remove wax from silver candlestick holders with a blow-dryer: Use the blow-dryer to soften the wax, then just peel it off.
Clean off radiators
Are those dusty cast-iron radiators around your house becoming something of an eyesore? To clean them, hang a large, damp cloth behind each radiator. Then use your blow-dryer on its highest, coolest setting to blow dust and hidden dirt onto the cloth.
Remove bumper stickers
Want to remove those cutesy stickers your kids used to decorate your car bumper to “surprise” you? Grab an extension cord and run your blow-dryer on its hottest setting to soften the adhesive. Move the dryer slowly back and forth for several minutes, then use your fingernail or credit card to lift up a corner and slowly peel off.
Dust off silk flowers and artificial houseplants
They may require less care than their living counterparts, but silk flowers and artificial houseplants are apt to collect dust and dirt. Use your blow-dryer on its highest, coolest setting for a quick, efficient way to clean them off. Since this will blow the dust onto the furniture surfaces and floor around the plant, do this just before you vacuum those areas.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.