Make your own soap
Homemade soap is a great gift and snap to make if you have glycerin and a microwave. Here’s how: Cut the glycerin material, usually sold in blocks, into 2-inch (5-centimeter) cubes. Using a microwave set at half-power, zap several cubes in a glass container for 30 seconds at a time — checking and stirring as needed — until the glycerin melts. Add drops of color dye or scents at this point, if you wish. Pour the melted glycerin into soap or candy molds. If you don’t have any molds, fill the bottom 3/4 inch (2 centimeters) of a polystyrene cup. Let harden for 30 minutes.
Clean a freezer spill
Spilled sticky foods that are frozen to the bottom of your freezer don’t have a chance against glycerin. Unstick the spill and wipe it clean with a rag dabbed with glycerin, a natural solvent.
Remove tar stains
Do you think it’s impossible to remove a tar or mustard stain? It’s not, if you use glycerin. Rub glycerin into the spot and leave it for about an hour. Then, with paper towels, gently remove the spot using a blot-and-lift motion. You may need to do this several times.
Make new liquid soap
Wondering what to do with those little leftover slivers of soap? Add a bit of glycerin and crush them together with some warm water. Pour the mixture into a pump bottle. You’ll have liquid soap on the cheap.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.