Don’t treat moths to a fine meal of your homemade or store-bought woolen sweaters and blankets. When putting them into storage, wrap your woolens in a few sheets of newspaper (be sure to tape up the corners). It will keep away the moths, and keep out dust and dirt.
For an effortless and foolproof way to keep blankets and quilts securely bundled before they go into temporary storage, wrap them up in large “rubber bands” made from the waistbands from your used pantyhose. You can reuse the bands year after year if needed.
Add 2 cups white vinegar to your washer’s rinse water (or a washtub filled with water) to remove soap residue from both cotton and wool blankets before drying. This will also leave them feeling fresh and soft as new.
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.
I think my pilot was a little inexperienced. We were sitting on the runway, and he said, “OK, folks, we’re gonna be taking off in a just few—whoa! Here we go.”
“I can’t wait until your vacation is over.” —Everyone following you on Instagram
A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.
Comedian Greg Davies
Just found the worst page in the entire dictionary. What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.
Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company videos viral.
My cat just walked up to the paper shredder and said, “Teach me everything you know.”
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” —Alcohol
@yoyoha (Josh Hara)
My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic.