Doug was leaving church after Christmas services when Father McCarthy took him aside. "Douglas, my son," he said, "it’s time you joined the Army of the Lord. We need to see you every Sunday."
"I’m already in the Army of the Lord, Father," Doug replied.
"Then why do we only see you on Christmas and Easter?"
Doug looked to the right and to the left, and then leaned over to whisper in Father McCarthy’s ear. "I’m in the Secret Service."