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Corny Jokes

Groaning is the best medicine, as you'll find out fast with this collection of funny, corny jokes.

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The Mime Who Shopped

Did you hear the one about the mime who went shopping? He only bought unmentionables.—Contributed by James Brink

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The Claustrophobic Astronaut

Did you hear the one about the claustrophobic astronaut? He needed some space.—Contributed by…

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The Heavy Cartoonist

Did you hear the one about the 400-pound cartoonist? He was overdrawn.—Contributed by James…

50%
The Unemployed Knife-Sharpener

Did you hear the one about the knife-sharpener who quit his job? He couldn't stand the daily…

45%
The Mime Who Shopped

Did you hear the one about the mime who went shopping? He only bought…

80%
The Allergic Convict

Did you hear the one about the convict who had an allergy? He broke out.—Contributed by James…

25%
G-E-T W-E-L-L S-O-O-N

Matt swallowed all the tiles from his Scrabble set. Doctors said the problem will work itself out…

64%
Hey, Break a Leg!

Did you hear about the Broadway actor who broke through the floorboards? He was just going through…

56%
Overheard: Weight a Minute!

Girl #1 (picking up box of baking soda): I didn't know soda was baked. Girl #2: Thank God it's not…

38%
Overheard: Voided of Thought

Girl: Why would he say that I was not educated? Friend: Well, that's not exactly what he said…

67%
Overheard: Eye Gotcha!

Guy: Your glasses can't be bad—you just got them! Girl: Yeah, but I cheated on the eye exam…

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