Office Jokes

NEW FUNNY JOKES

I Don't Say "Hey" Pro Bono

A lawyer e-mailed a client: “Dear Jennifer:…

New From the China National Tourism Administration...

The China National Tourism Administration has…

"Brought to You by the Division of Vague Announcements"

Heard over the plant’s paging 
system:…

Department of (Ridiculous) Corrections

Journalists and editors on deadline make the…

Part-Time Work

Scene: A man applying for credit 
at a…

How to Deal With an Errant Bosom

Recently, a man stopped at my desk at the library…

PowerPoint: the Program You Love to Hate …

• Were Moses alive today, the Ten Commandments…

The Saddest Story I Know

While at a convention, Bill, Jim, and Scott…

Coversation With A Customer-Service Representative:

Me: I have a Roundup Multi Purpose Sprayer that…

The One About The Fishermen and The Angel

Three guys are fishing when an angel…

Wanted: Human Torch

Who wouldn’t be inspired 
to hire this young…

State of Confusion

Scene: The office Me: We have to submit a form…

Don't Even Ask About Condiments...

Scene: office cafeteria line Friend: May I…

Am I That Tough?

After interviewing a candidate for an open…

Overheard at Our Hospital

Phlebotomist: I’m here to draw some…

A Company by Any Other Name

There was a period when our company’s ownership…

Time Flies

As a flight attendant, I wear a watch with two…

Color Me Stupid

A client walked into my design studio with a…

Poor word choice, Doc

A doctor sent this note to our medical clinic:…

The New Rules of the Workplace

These office drones know exactly what you’re…

Work is an Onion

Supervisor: This project isn’t something we can…

England's oddest visa requests

It’s Winter break time, and a lot of people…

My cousin once called in sick...

My cousin once called in sick to work because of…

A Grave Error

Our business relies heavily on abbreviations. For…

Tip from an Office Drone

I just set my e-mail’s auto-response to…

Fraction Infraction

One of my fourth-grade students told me he had…

Job Candi-dolts

Doing your best not to join 
the workforce?…

Security to Aisle Three...

From an ad for an acting job: “When we finish…

Things Could Get Graphic

If you’re a freelance graphic designer, the…

Teach A Man to Kvetch...

Comedian Daniel Tosh is no fan 
of the…

What’s the 311?

In New York City, if you have a complaint or a…

Thanks, I Think


I recently ran into an old student of mine, who…

Prove It!

Scene: Me at our auto dealership, cold-calling…

How Not to Get Hired

Going in for a job interview? Don’t mess it up…

First Step's A Doozy

Mike went into work an hour late, his face…

Can You Hear Me Ever?

I could barely understand my client due to a…

70 Years Young

When I interviewed for a job six months after my…

Bosses Say the Darnedest Things

Here are actual comments bosses made to employees…

Hush, Little Actuary

An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and…

Job Security

Reddit.com asked workers: What is rule number one…

Happy Birthday, Valued Employee!

My boss gave me a generic birthday card. It read…

Think Globally, Work Scarcely

From the news: “Bob” was considered a star at…

What I Call "an Idiot."

Scene: Office Suit: Do you have what I call a…

Can I Speak To Dad?

Today, my boss fired me from my job at a local…

I Don't Know, Let Me Ask My Manager

Yesterday, a guy came up to me at work and said…

Good Qualities

We asked prospective job applicants at our…

Is the Client Always Right?

A graphic designer on the phone with his…

Drug Dealer?

My brother delivered prescriptions to people too…

How to Ruin an Interview

When you're interviewing for a job, you want to…

Sensitive Employee

To show his appreciation, a newly hired Japanese…

Strengths and Weaknesses

A job applicant was asked, "What would you…

True Tweet

A truer tweet has never been tweeted: "4:30…

Weirdest Interview Questions

Job hunting is stressful enough without having to…

Harshest Incentive

A candy company’s sales team was promised a…

Meeting Time

Meetingboy.com invites viewers to gripe about…

Overconfidence

My sister Angela was impressed by a job…

Global Companies

After receiving the umpteenth late-night…

The Right Experience?

Someone advertising on Craigslist said she was…

Good Experience

When a woman applies for a job at a citrus grove…

With Regular Use

When asked her opinion on punctuality, an…

To Whom it May Really Concern

My friend had been pounding the pavement in…

You Know When It's Time

"Why did you leave your last job?"…

Dates Attended

Applicants for jobs at the company where my…

Optimism

My go-getter coworker asked me, "Andrea, why…

Best Reason to Strike

Workers at the Carlsberg brewery in Denmark…

Crazy Work Excuses

We know you’d never do it, but some people…

Payback Time

When a Middletown, New Jersey, police officer…

Job Posting Truth

Posted by the Illinois Valley News: "How bad…

Job Hunting

I just saw an ad for a position I feel completely…

Work Gripes

The Twitter account @MeetingBoy invites viewers…

Job Search

The toughest part of applying for a new job is…

Worst Job Applicant

Cops had no trouble tracking down a woman who…

Clients From Hell

Clientsfromhell.com was established by freelance…

Making the Case

While I was assigned to the space shuttle…

Poor Excuse for an Employee

Need a reason for being late to work? Don't try…

Get Me Copy!

September is Be Kind to Editors and Writers…

Possession Charge

During her retirement party from the Cook County…

Skills

I called a temp agency looking for work, and they…

Bad Interviews

Going on a job interview? Take pity on the poor…

Funny Character Descriptions

Humorist Phil Proctor does a lot of radio…

Emergency

I opened the refrigerator at work to get my…

Indispensable

When my boss returned to the office, he was told…

Odd Job

One read through this man's résumé…

TMI

A job application made me do a double take. After…

Experience

I won't be hiring this assistant soon, even if…

Assets

While auditing one of our departments, an…

Arrangements Can Be Made

An employment website boasted that it provided…

Payday

A friend had a waitressing position open at his…

An Honest Answer

A job interviewer asked me where I wanted to be…

Job Hazards

I had an inauspicious start as a dog groomer when…

Odd Job

Our daughter took the afternoon off from her job…

Greener Pastures

Before leaving my assistant job for greener…

So When Do I Start?

How do you get human resources to remember you?…

4 Creative Ways to Get Hired

How do you get hiring managers to hire you?…

The Dog Ate My Alarm Clock

According to careerbuilder.com, a full 15 percent…

Help Wanting

Here's a job to avoid: hiring manager. See what…

Evaluation

I input a junior manager's self-evaluation, which…

Resume Classics

What's the finest example of fiction today? The…

Late for Work

Johnson, who always shows up for work on time…

3 Resume Killers

Looking for a job? Try to avoid these…