Funny Character Descriptions

Humorist Phil Proctor does a lot of radio voice-overs. But his favorite part of the job is reading the character descriptions in the script:

• "We’re looking for the voice of God, but not a goofy God, a real God."

• "Sounds good-looking."

• (For a fast-food campaign) "This is not a bitter chicken, but he is having trouble coping with the modern world."

• "Female voice. American. Sultry, like drinking chocolate from the back of a moose."