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A Victorious Moment
Heather started treatment in late April 2003, and by the middle of that month she was well enough to return to work part-time at the law firm. She and Brad also went to a lung cancer support group. Heather was by far the youngest patient. She found it heartening to meet ten friendly survivors, and hear their stories of victory and determination.Meanwhile, Brad made a decision: He was going to propose. "For a few months, I'd known in my heart that I wanted to marry Heather, but I'd thought it was too soon to ask," says the 36-year-old financial planner. "I wanted to be with her whether she had cancer or not, because I loved her." On the Friday night before her treatment was to begin, during a Scrabble game he spelled out the words "marry me" on the board, then showed her a sparkling diamond ring. Thrilled, she flung her arms in the air and, laughing and crying, said, "Yes, yes, yes!"
Her happiness helped her get through the first few days of radiation. "I was on cloud nine, showing my ring to anyone who would listen," says Heather. When she lay on a green hospital recliner for her first chemo session, and watched the drugs drip into her arm, she was filled with dread, not just of the side effects, but also the possibility that it wouldn't work. According to her doctor, James Stevenson, MD, co-director of the Comprehensive Lung Cancer Program at the Cancer Institute of New Jersey at Cooper University Hospital, "only 15 to 20 percent of people with her stage of cancer are cured, even with chemotherapy and radiation. Most don't live more than two years. But if anyone could beat those odds, it's Heather. She's young and healthy, and has every reason to be optimistic."
During the treatment, however, she got sicker and more discouraged every day. She vomited blood, developed blistering burns on her chest and back, and smelled a constant charred scent that left her too nauseated to eat. The 5' 7" mom's weight dropped from 140 pounds to 113, and her strawberry-blond curls fell out in clumps. Brad moved in to take care of her. As she got sicker, her thoughts grew increasingly gloomy. "When Brad talked about our wedding, a voice in my head asked if I'd still be around then. I had visions of Tyler sobbing because I'd died. I'd watch him as he slept, and wonder if he'd remember me."
But one night, as she sat by Tyler's bed, her sadness shifted to fierce determination. "It was as if a switch clicked on inside me," she says. "I had to make it through the treatment so I could beat this monster. My little boy needed me -- and I needed him!" She battled side effects for months, but little by little her strength returned. To track her progress, she had lung scans every three months, and was elated when test after test found no sign of cancer. On January 15, 2004, she wore a strapless ivory gown as she married Brad on a cruise ship, with Tyler as the best man.
In November 2004, however, she got terrible news: A scan showed 25 or more specks scattered through both lungs. Because the nodules were so tiny, it was impossible to biopsy them, says Dr. Stevenson. He determined it could be a microscopic spread of her cancer, or inflammation from her treatment. He advised scans every three months to see if the spots grew significantly. If so, he'd do a biopsy. And if cancer was found, the only treatment was chemotherapy. But until there was a clear diagnosis, they could only watch and wait.
Each subsequent scan showed that the specks had grown slightly, but not enough for a biopsy. Faced with constant anxiety, and no immediate medical options, Heather looked for other ways to protect her health. Since she was already slim, exercised as much as possible and avoided exposure to secondhand smoke, she only had one bad habit to kick: her terrible diet.
"I'd have a soft pretzel with mustard for breakfast, fast food burgers for lunch, and nachos glopped with cheese for dinner." In May 2005 she began a special macrobiotic diet. Dr. Stevenson okayed the plan. "Some of my patients with advanced lung cancer have tried a macrobiotic diet. For someone like Heather, it may have an impact, but there's not much research on that." She says she's never felt healthier, and on her most recent scan, the spots remain tiny, leading Dr. Stevenson to conclude that if they are cancer, it's a very slow-growing form. "There's still reason for optimism," he says.
To celebrate, in March 2006 Heather and Brad went on a seven-day cruise. Leaving winter behind, they visited Dunns River Falls in Jamaica. As rushing water splashed their legs, they began to climb the 600-foot waterfall. While many people stopped at a platform partway up, Heather pushed on, despite her radiation-damaged lungs, until she made it to the top. That victorious moment, she says, sums up her cancer journey: "It's a series of slippery rocks I've had to climb for the past three years. I don't know where I'll end up, but whatever the obstacles are, I'm determined to take that next step."
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