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Watching your elderly mother nod off in front of the television may bring soft smiles of affection from your family—“Awwww, there goes Grandma again!” But if they saw your mother up and pacing the floor at 4:00 A.M., they might not think her naps were so endearing. Not only can’t she sleep, but you can’t, either—not when you know she’s so miserable.
As our aging parents continue to live longer than any other generation, many of us are increasingly involved in their health and well-being, whether they live with us or not.
One woman is roused from sleep every morning at 4:00 A.M. by the sounds of her 80-year-old mother making oatmeal in the kitchen. By the time she hears the clang of the pot going into the sink to be washed, the sound of the stainless-steel spoon scraping round and round and round the pot as her mother stirs the oatmeal has already raised her blood pressure and driven sleep away.
Another eighty-something woman, who lives on her own, has started calling her niece on the phone in the middle of the night. “I have to get to the hospital!” she demands tearfully. “Your uncle needs me!” Her niece gently reminds the elderly woman that her husband died two years ago, then spends an hour consoling the grief-stricken woman.
With help from geriatric doctors, professional caregivers, and therapists who specialize in the challenges of old age, most of us painstakingly work these issues out.
But as we do, we’re torn between the need to help and the need to sleep. Eventually, usually in the middle of a dark, restless night, we begin to realize that if we want to sleep, we need to help them get to sleep as well.
A study at Harvard Medical School reveals that bright-light therapy can reduce “sundowning,” the agitated behavior that frequently occurs in those with Alzheimer’s disease at sundown. The more severe the behavior, the more effective the therapy.
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