What to Do After You Get Engaged

He popped the question, you said yes, the engagement ring's on your finger. Take a deep breath and view our list of 13 things to do once you're engaged.

By Amy Zerello
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    1. Tell your parents.

    Give them the honor of hearing the news first. Have the champagne ready to celebrate.

    2. Make the calls.

    Before you log in to Facebook to update your relationship status or tweet your happy news, be certain everyone who should hear it from you personally has been called.

    3. Get a manicure.

    Your finger and its sparkly new adornment will be getting a lot of attention.

    4. Speaking of rings, get yours appraised and insured!

    5. Craft a catchall response.

    You’ll be asked when you’re getting married often. Get past the “big day” question by choosing a month, season or even just a year.

    6. Perfect your proposal story.

    Everyone will be asking how he popped the question. Craft a retelling that reflects the beauty and magic of the moment.

    7. Make a pass at your guest list.

    Before you even begin the venue search, nail down this magic number. Planners want to how many people you’re inviting so they can pair you with spaces (ballrooms, tents, etc.) that can accommodate head count. Packages are also priced in ranges based on guest minimums, so this will help you with the next step: budgeting.

    8. Set a budget and start saving.

    It’s easy to get carried away planning for the happiest day of your life, but ask yourself, do you want to be paying for the wedding years after the honeymoon, or would you rather go house hunting?

    9. Places, please!

    Figuring out where to hold the reception is hard work. You may visit several venues before finding “the one.” Make this part of the planning as fun as possible by staying calm and organized. Create a spreadsheet (and consider sharing it in a Google Doc) with your fiancé to keep tabs on the venues you visit, what you like (or don’t like) about them, their prices, etc.

    10. Buy a few bridal magazines.

    The Internet can be overwhelming when you’re wading through wedding websites. Magazines can help remedy that feeling. Pick one up and start folding pages, mark them with post-its, and have fun.

    11. Relinquish control.

    Can you plan the entire wedding by yourself? No one can answer this question but you (and possibly your Mom). If you’re the type of person who’d rather not stress over the details, a wedding planner will help tremendously.

    12. Re-read number 4.

    It’s highly likely you’ll postpone insuring your engagement ring. Don’t. Here’s some great advice from theknot.com that explains everything you should know about protecting your ring: “Insurance 101: Engagement Ring Insurance.”

    13. Relax.

    Do your best to avoid any unnecessary stress. You don’t want anyone cracking Bridezilla jokes about you, right? Some days will feel completely overwhelming. When this happens, grab a latte, go for a pedicure and think about how amazing your wedding is going to be. Plus: 10 Thoughtful Wedding Gifts on a Budget 5 Things Never to Say to a Bride How to Stay Engaged to Your Budget through Wedding Season 8 Marriage-Busters to Give Up Today!

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    Your Comments

    • PandaGirl

      how long should the engagement be? :x

      • M Berhorst14

        No more than nine months. If you haven’t set a date by then, not gonna happen.

        • loveoverpride

          Not at all true. In fact they say that (yes, there are the exceptions) however for the most part, the sooner you get married, the quicker you get divorced. People rarely enjoy the “engagement” part anymore. It’s always such a rush to plan right away, that people often forget to stop & enjoy the engagement. It’s all about “wedding, wedding, wedding.” People forget about “Marriage…” I know 2 couples who have been engaged for a little over 2 years now, (financially they can’t afford a big wedding,and one person in their late 20′s is still finishing school) I have to say, they truly do seem so much happier then the couples who rushed got so swept up and rushed to the alter, because it’s what was expected of them. Both the engaged couples live together and share in household responsibilities. Both couples want to go about it the “smart” way and not go into a marriage with tremendous debt and be forced to have to go to a courthouse, just because society tells them that something is “wrong” with them not trying the knot in a year or less. Both of the couples share traits of being very ambitious people and they are all hard workers. They are all independent people, in the healthy sort of way. Neither couple have children yet and all four people are over the age of 25, but younger then 35. I have to say they are doing it right (this coming from someone who had the big wedding and was divorced 5 years later.) Also, my grandparents were engaged for two years (while my grandfather was in the service) granted, they were just teenagers. However, they lasted over 50 years ,and 3 children later, consistently very happy. When I asked them what their secret was they said it was because. “They really knew each other, before they got married.” They made a huge commitment to one another by being engaged, however exchanging letters and really getting to know one another and what the expectations where of one another and what their mutual goals as a couple were as well as individual goals.” It helped them open up with one another because they were already betrothed to one another, however they could still view one another as an independent person (especially in a day in age where that wasn’t the “norm”, especially for women.) While most women were getting married and having babies, my grandmother was going to college to get an education (not looking for a husband because she already had a fiance.) Which ended up coming in handy when my grandfather lost his job years later for a short time and my grandmother was the one to go to work to help support the household and kids. (Most women in that day would have been petrified.) It made my grandparents bond even stronger and they were always secure with one another and in their love, because they never listened to people’s “stereotypes” or what the “norm” should be. Each couple is unique and they have to find what works for them, not everyone else. Doesn’t mean they love each other any less or won’t ever be married, I (and a thousands of other people around the world) can promise you that =)

    • Dan Bliek

      call the engagement/wedding off…