These witty words will have you laughing all the way through the holiday season.
You know, the birth of Santa. —Bart Simpson
that very special time of year when we join with our loved ones in sharing centuries-old traditions such as trying to find a parking space at the mall. —Dave Barry
with a note on it saying "toys not included." —Bernard Manning
is looking for a job the next day. —Phyllis Diller
like a cheese log. —Ellen DeGeneres
Mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph. —Shirley Temple
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