"Did you hear the one about the guy who died mid-sen "
"Pardon me, sir. I did not do it on purpose."
"It would really be more than the English could stand if another century began and I were still alive."
"Don't disturb my circles!"
"Give back everything to..."
"I am sorry to trouble you chaps. I don't know how you get along so fast with the traffic on the roads these days."
"Thank God. I'm tired of being the funniest person in the room."
"You will not see me alive at sunrise."
"The flames already?"
"Okay, okay, I'll come. Just give it a moment."
"I am about to—or am going to—die: either expression is correct."
"I'm looking for loopholes."
"On the contrary."
7 Funny Signs That Don't Get How to "Use" Quotation Marks