50 Amazing Dad Quotes for Father’s Day
“I used to wonder why I had hair on my legs, but now I know it’s for my toddlers to pull themselves up with as I scream in pain.” How comic Jim Gaffigan found his purpose and so many other truths about living the dad life.
He may not wear a cape but…
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“Dad is, and always will be, my living, breathing superhero.” –Bindi Irwin, daughter of the late Steve Irwin. Crocodile hunter Steve Irwin was taken too young, but devoted daughter Bindi keeps his memory alive by continuing his conservation work and spreading his love for all animals (even the “scary” ones). For more heartwarming stories read about these dads sharing the most touching Father’s Day gift they ever received.
All dads have rules—all kids break them
“My sisters and I can still recite Dad’s grilling rules: Rule No. 1: Dad is in charge. Rule No. 2: Repeat Rule No. 1.” –Connie Schultz. Dads are just little boys who love setting things on fire but all grown up. So you either have to choose a life of arson or barbecue—thankfully most dads choose the grill.
Why can nobody in this house turn off a light?!
“By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.” –Charles Wadsworth, a classical pianist. One day you look in the mirror and realize that not only do you look like your dad, you act like him and sound like him too. If you’re really lucky, he’ll even be around to point it out to you.
Dad-fashion rule #1
“You can tell what was the best year of your father’s life because he seems to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.” –Jerry Seinfeld. Dads get a lot of flack for their cargo shorts, old t-shirts, and white (grass-stained) sneakers, but the truth is they were saving their money to make sure you had nice clothes. OK, and they really just love those shorts. So. Many. Pockets.
Want to know how to be a good man? Learn from the best.
“Mom and Dad were married 64 years. And if you wondered what their secret was, you could have asked the local florist—because every day Dad gave Mom a rose, which he put on her bedside table.” –Mitt Romney. Romney credits his dad with teaching him how to be a husband and father. Now, grab a tissue because the post-script makes this story of a decades-long marriage even sweeter. “That’s how my mom found out what happened on the day my father died—she went looking for him because that morning, there was no rose,” he added.
How to give your kids good self-esteem
“I asked my dad if I looked fat in my bathing suit at the beach and he said ‘Keep drinking and you won’t care.” –Hannah S, from The Tonight Show. This dad has certainly figured out one hilarious answer to the “Does this make me look fat?” question. For more fatherly wisdom, check out funny advice dads will love.
Dads set examples
“My father didn’t tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.” –Clarence Budington Kelland, author. Great dads know that telling your child to do something is a recipe for complaining, but working alongside your child is a recipe for lifelong success and adoration.
Well played, dad, well played
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“When I was little my dad had me convinced the ice cream truck only played music when it was sold out.” –Anonymous. The ease with which some dads come up with “creative” explanations on the fly is a seriously underrated skill. Although they may come to regret it when their kids grow up to be “creative” teens!
Being a dad is a lot of work
“Any man can be a father but it takes someone special to be a dad.” –Anne Geddes. Being a dad is so much more than giving your last name or sharing your DNA. Signing your name to the birth certificate is a lifelong promise of love and support. To see how real dads honor this, check out these 31 hilarious stories about dads.
All he really wants for Father’s Day is a nap
“There should be a children’s song: ‘If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your dad sleep.’” –Jim Gaffigan. When your kids are young they want to tell you everything even though it’s nothing you want to know. If you’re a good listener then they’ll still talk to you when they’re older and you want to know everything.