Have you always wanted to be a mom?Yuganov-Konstantin/Shutterstock
Kate McNeil did. She comes from a very close family, and being a mom was always part of the life she saw for herself. So when she wasn’t finding a worthy partner and she was getting older…she realized not having a partner didn’t need to keep her from having a family. Kate started telling friends about how she could leave Brooklyn, move to New Jersey, and become a mom. She could do this on her own. Kate cautions that once you start building out that vision, it can happen rather quickly. In her case, once she decided to give single parenthood a go, she was pregnant within four months. Read on to find out everything she learned on her own journey to motherhood.
The single mother by choice community is pretty amazingMaxFrost/Shutterstock
Whether you’re thinking about it or ready to do it, there’s an incredible amount of support online. From Single Mothers By Choice, the leading support group, to books like Knock Yourself Up, you’ll find other women who are in your situation and those who’ve been through it who are sticking around to mentor someone like you. For decades, women have been becoming a single mother by choice. There’s a lot of experience you can tap into in this incredibly supportive community.
Searching for sperm can be funDean-Drobot/Shutterstock
And that’s not in the old-fashioned meet-a-guy, share-a-meal search for sperm. This is literally searching for the other half of the DNA that will create a child for you, should you chose to try to have a biological child on your own, instead of going the adoption route. There are plenty of sperm banks on line, and they are feature-rich with essays and report cards, baby pictures, and celebrity look alike analyses. You’ll learn about their health history (and can even go back a couple generations), physical features, and religious background. Sometimes there are even audio interviews. It’s fun and a little funny, and if you have health priorities (do auto-immune diseases run in your family?), then this is a great way to sort through the abundant sperm that’s available for purchase.