Compliments do wonders for your brain
If you’re like most couples, you’ve probably experienced moments in your relationship when you feel almost invisible to each other because you allow other things like kids, money, or health to take priority over your relationship. If this is your story, consider the power of the compliment, says Michele Paiva, a psychotherapist in Downingtown, Pennsylvania. “Compliments show you don’t take your spouse for granted and help raise your spouse’s dopamine and oxytocin levels,” she says. “That, in turn, leads to a better emotional connection and more of an upbeat mood overall.” These tips will give your daily compliments extra impact.
Compliments are best when they’re specific
To compliment effectively, focus on a quality you especially value in your partner, such as ‘I really appreciate how dedicated you are as a mother to our children.’ Or focus on a specific deed, says David Routt, a licensed professional counselor in Caldwell, Idaho. “Instead of just saying ‘Thanks, honey,’ say ‘Thank you for washing the dishes, honey, it means a lot to me.’ Being specific is always much better than being generic.” And it goes without saying that the compliment should be sincere. (Check out these other tips for giving sincere compliments.)