Don't seek revenge
If you were the one who was dumped, chances are you’re hurting, and want your ex to feel the same levels of emotional heartbreak you do. However, this doesn’t mean you seek revenge on your former flame to get over a breakup. There are lines you just don’t cross when a relationship ends; don’t spread rumors, burn his favorite shirt he left at your house, or trash talk on his social media accounts. It’s never a mistake to take the high road.
Don't reconnect with other exes
It’s really tempting to call another ex once a relationship ends. You once had a romantic connection with that person, he or she is familiar to you, and you’re craving an emotional and physical connection as you try to move on. Plus, in the back of your mind, it’s a type of revenge against the one who recently cracked your heart. However, when it comes to an ex reconnect—don’t do it. They’re called “exes” for a reason—you two weren’t meant to be.
Don’t stalk him or her on social media
Unfollow your ex from all forms of social media, and perhaps some of his or her family members and friends as well. Unfriending, or at least hiding your ex online, can help you avoid the constant temptation to check in and see if your ex is living a life more miserable—or more awesome—than yours. (Besides, you’re too busy enjoying your new salsa meringue dance class to even skim their social media page, right? Right?) These other social media mistakes can also damage your relationships.
Don’t keep reminders around
Delete social media pictures of your happier days (or have a friend do so you don’t get nostalgic), stash away photos you have around the house, and donate that giant teddy bear he won for you at the carnival. Don’t stop there. Take the opportunity to get your whole house organized. You may also want to stay away from mutual places you visited for a few weeks, so fond memories aren’t triggered. It’s time to start anew, and that may include changing up your whole daily routine, at least initially. This gives you time to set new routines and adapt to being single.
Don’t forget to learn something
“I’m a big believer that no relationship is a waste a time if we learn from it,” says Dr. Mann. “Ask yourself, ‘How did I contribute to the relationship’s demise?’ or ‘How can I be a better partner in the future?’” If you’re honest, you can take away something positive from the experience. Find out the science behind a happy marriage.