Don’t: Act like nothing happened
Ignoring that you even had an argument or pretending it never happened isn’t a wise idea. “Sweeping it under the rug assumes your partner is satisfied with the outcome. But making a clear effort to reconnect is the key to a successful outcome. Sharing what you have learned after a fight can help repair the damage,” says Lesli M. W. Doares, a marriage consultant and coach with a private practice in Cary, North Carolina, and author of Blueprint for a Lasting Marriage: How to Create Your Happily Ever After With More Intention, Less Work. “And, make no mistake, there is always damage.” If you don’t let your partner know that what you fought about bothers you, your resentment could bubble up in the future and you could just eventually explode. “Something triggered the fight that must be addressed,” says Laurel House, a dating and empowerment coach on E!’s Famously Single. Remember to pick your battles when assessing if something really warrants further discussion or decide if you can let it slide. “The important things you ignore are the things that manifest into larger issues,” says relationship expert Andrea Syrtash and author of He’s Just Not Your Type (And That’s a Good Thing). Remember: These phrases are guaranteed to make any fight worse.