Before thought: I'm always going to struggle financially
After thought: Financial struggles are hard, but I can make one choice today to build up my nest egg. Sarah Newcomb, a Morningstar behavioral economist and author of a study titled When More Is Less: Rethinking Financial Health found that self-assuredness has an impact on financial progress, as reported in TIME. Newcomb discovered that people she surveyed who agreed with the statement, "I create my own financial destiny," were more likely to have positive associations with their financial life than those who expressed powerlessness when it comes to saving, investing, and earning more. Here are some premier habits from money saving experts to go along with your newfound positive thinking.
Before thought: My to-do list is so long that I'll never get anything done
After thought: If I do one thing at a time, I'll surprise myself by how much I accomplish. Shooting for the moon when it comes to getting things done? Some of the greatest thinkers in the world had this productivity trick in common.
Before thought: I won't ever get over my ex
After thought: I will heal and find the right relationship for me. Ellen Langer, a professor of psychology at Harvard University who has been described as "the mother of mindfulness," explains that we can choose our thoughts. She says, "People are often stressed about losing romantic relationships, but relationships require two people and if both of the people aren't in it, you might prosper by letting that relationship end." Are you in a partnership that should end? Here are 9 subtle signs of a toxic relationship.
Before thought: I'm worried about tomorrow
After thought: What can I focus on in the next 10 minutes? "It's best to assume you'll be fine and get on with business. People need to recognize that life only consists of moments," Langer says. Since this moment is all we have, we'll take her word for it.
Before thought: People always let me down
After thought: Disappointments are bound to happen sometimes. When they do, I choose how to react. Since disappointments happen in everyone's life, don't let unfulfilled expectations stress you out. Here, are some proven 5-second strategies for shutting down stress.
Before thought: My idea is stupid
After thought: Creativity makes me feel vulnerable, but I believe in my idea and while I'm open to feedback, I refuse to criticize myself. Voicing suggestions at work and in our personal lives can be scary. We might want to propose new date ideas to our partner or business plans to our boss, but we can fear how we're going to be perceived. The key is to acknowledge our fears but still move forward and accept what comes.
Before thought: I'm not good enough at what I do
After thought: I have strengths and weakness, and I get better every day. It might sound like a trendy self-help phase, but it's true: self-compassion is good for our health.To keep thoughts about self-worth or abilities in context remember that self-confidence can be developed, that you can't control anyone but yourself, and even if your higher-ups don't approve of you, you can even survive a bad review.
Before thought: If I move somewhere new I'll regret it
After thought: There's no way I can know the outcome of a move. Langer says, "You're in charge of how you see the world." Reframing our thoughts in the context of a life transition is somewhat of an intellectual game. We have to ask yourselves how else can a situation be viewed beside how we are currently viewing it? Maybe a move will bring new relationships or career opportunities. Langer says, "People tend to conflate and confuse prediction and postdiction." The truth is that predictions are largely an illusion, and we don't really know how things will play out. Two ways to counteract this thinking is to generate five potential positive outcomes for any given event and also evaluate where you may have predicted wrong in the past and use that information as leverage for the present. Thinking about moving? Ask these questions first.
Before thought: I'm always the one who has to say I'm sorry
After thought: I'm a compassionate person. Positive thinking isn't just about looking on the bright side—it's about seeing yourself and events in more nuanced, layered ways that leave space for helpful conclusions. Instead of self-pity, you can usually find a reason to feel good about who you are.
Before thought: Getting older sucks
After thought: The older I get, the wiser I become. Why get down about aging? It's part of life. Instead of resisting age, embrace it. Become a "super ager" with these 10 secrets.