You’re not having sex as often as you did earlier on in your relationship
An ongoing preference to go to bed early instead of enjoying time between the sheets—especially when you both used to feel more frisky more frequently—can be an indication that stress is hurting your relationship. Although it’s not uncommon for the sexual energy that was once extremely common during the romantic phase of your relationship to wane, every couple still carries with them those initial memories of romantic bonding, says Julia Breur, PhD, a licensed marriage and family therapist with a private clinical psychotherapy practice in Boca Raton, Florida. Even if you’re not in the mood for sex, look for little ways to touch each other: Hug and kiss every day or hold hands when you’re watching TV on the sofa. Make date night a priority and that spark will rekindle in time. Check out these 31 steamy tips to boost libido.
You’re not as interested in what your partner has to say
If you find yourself offering a lot of “uh-huh’s” and “that’s nice” comments whenever your partner tells you about their day or an idea they have, that’s a telltale sign that stress is taking over. Don’t let thoughts of tomorrow’s meeting or mounting bills disrupt your communication. Instead, Schneberger says that eye-contact as well as active listening between both parties is key, and can help foster enhanced communication. Do your best to lock eyes with your partner and focus on what they are saying and try these other tips to be a good listener.
Your partner spends more time with other family members than you
It’s not unusual to call or visit family members, but when it becomes an escapist behavior in which your partner interacts more with them than you, that’s a red flag. Breur explains that a host of assumptions enter the picture in this case, including the feeling that your partner is more comfortable talking for long periods of time about topics that should be reserved for the two of you. Similarly, your partner may opt to spend more time with your children or pet than you. The fix, Breur says, is to specifically convey to your partner how this makes you feel, while offering a compromise at the same time. For example, suggest that your partner still speak with their sibling, but tell them that talking for two hours daily is bothersome for you. Then, suggest reducing phone time and use the extra time to spend together. If you do any of these things you might be showing these signs of a toxic relationship.