Your partner spends more time with other family members than you
It’s not unusual to call or visit family members, but when it becomes an escapist behavior in which your partner interacts more with them than you, that’s a red flag. Breur explains that a host of assumptions enter the picture in this case, including the feeling that your partner is more comfortable talking for long periods of time about topics that should be reserved for the two of you. Similarly, your partner may opt to spend more time with your children or pet than you. The fix, Breur says, is to specifically convey to your partner how this makes you feel, while offering a compromise at the same time. For example, suggest that your partner still speak with their sibling, but tell them that talking for two hours daily is bothersome for you. Then, suggest reducing phone time and use the extra time to spend together. If you do any of these things you might be showing these signs of a toxic relationship.
Your partner would rather check their Facebook status than look at your face
Sure, animal videos and banal updates on the lives of people you haven’t talked to since freshman year of college are interesting, but when your partner—or you— start scrolling though endless pages of internet happenings, that’s not doing your relationship any favors. “We truly have become a mobile world,” Dr. Breur says. “And with all the information and social media available 24/7, we have become a society that does not make communicating face to face a priority.” Her recommendation is to discuss this with your partner and come up with a tech-free solution you both agree on. One example might include not using the phone in the bedroom or while eating meals. Enjoying more personal interaction in a phone or computer-free environment will likely bring you closer. Here are 28 little things you can do today to make your marriage happier.
You’re easily bothered by their voice pattern, cough, or sneeze
Feel like you’d rather drag your nails on a chalkboard than hear your partner sneeze? If the sound of common habits, like a cough or sniffle start to irk you like no tomorrow, stress could be the culprit. Breur says that this is likely the stress you put on yourself manifesting in such a way that you become agitated with every little thing. She says to “be real about yourself” by assessing everything from whether you’re burning the candle at both ends at work to possible feelings that no one acknowledges your efforts. Next, ask your partner for help. After all, Breur explains, “Your partner is not a mind reader and needs to know your needs and even your life dreams.”