Put the phone down
Spending time alone with your partner? Ditch your phone. “Putting your phone away is a hard habit to break for couples, who are busy and need to stay up on work and family,” says Cherie Burbach, author of Art and Faith: Mixed Media Art With a Faith-Filled Message, who writes about listening and friendship at About.com. “But if you can do it, you’ll completely change how and your spouse are able to bond.” You shouldn’t be scrolling through Facebook during date night. “When your phones and other distractions are out of sight, you can focus on conversation with your spouse, including everything he isn’t saying directly,” says Burbach. “You’ll catch the sighs or eye rolls, see pain or frustration. And this will help you understand exactly where he’s coming from. When he feels ‘heard’ on this level, it makes the bond you have even stronger.” These are signs you’re too addicted to your phone.
Schedule a sexy weekend staycation
Intimacy can fall by the wayside when we get busy, but it’s important for couples to have an active and satisfying sex life. Hire a babysitter or recruit the grandparents to watch the kids for the weekend or the day. “Weekends tend to slip away if you don’t schedule, structure, and reserve them in advance,” says April Masini, a New York-based relationship and etiquette expert. “Long-term relationships require a little planning to get sexy. And without the social structure of dating, if you don’t schedule those romantic weekends, they’ll slip away, unused.” If your sex life has become particularly lackluster, revive it by changing venues or positions. Here are 7 ways to make sex great again.
You don’t just have to volunteer your time around the holidays; charitable organizations need help all year long. “Creating new positive memories is fundamental to a successful relationship,” says Justin A. D’Arienzo, PsyD, ABPP, a board-certified clinical psychologist and relationship expert at D’Arienzo Psychological Group in Jacksonville, Florida. “The sense of satisfaction or heightened emotion of service work will certainly add to the new memory shared together.” So instead of yet another movie date, focus on someone else by giving back at a soup kitchen or bringing a box of canned goods to the local food bank. You’ll get to spend time together as you do something good for the less fortunate.