Your fight with your cousin’s boyfriend
Family gossip is so tempting to share, especially when you have everyone gathered together. Resist the temptation, says Marni Amsellem, Ph.D, a licensed psychologist practicing in Connecticut and New York. Causing drama will get you attention but in all the wrong ways. Instead of focusing on whomever you’re talking about, the rest of the family will remember your bad behavior instead. “If there is something that you need to say to a relative about something that displeases you, save it for another time,” she says. “Otherwise this will be a dinner that the rest of the family references even decades from now—as in ‘Remember that Thanksgiving when Sheila told cousin Lucy that she thinks her boyfriend is a cheating scumbag and she’s an idiot to stay with him?'” And definitely, don’t bring up personal arguments between you and your partner as what you fight about may say more about your relationship than you meant to reveal. Discuss these 50 things to be grateful for on Thanksgiving instead.
What you think of the current president
Politics generally top the list for dinner subjects that should be verboten and that may be even truer this year than in previous years thanks to the very contentious political climate of late. But while you should probably leave personal attacks on or declarations of love for President Trump off the table that doesn’t mean you can’t discuss politics at all, Dr. Amsellem says. “If discussing politics, the discussion needs to be held tactfully and respectfully. Obviously, not everyone holds the same views, and it is important to try to refrain from name-calling or broad-group insults. This also holds when families are in agreement about political topics as well. Tact and decorum are key in self-expression when discussing heated topics, generally-speaking,” she explains. The exception? If these are family members you only see once a year or you already know their political views are the polar opposite of yours it’s best to just not bring it up, she adds.