We have the latest scoop on Kate and Meghan's relationship, according to an explosive new book
When it comes to royal drama, few duos have captured the public’s imagination like Kate and Meghan. The Princess of Wales and the Duchess of Sussex have been the subject of gossip from their first awkward hellos to the headlines surrounding “Megxit,” and for years fans have been dying to know: What’s really going on between these sisters-in-law?
Though Queen Elizabeth often touted the “never complain, never explain” royal credo, even Prince Harry admitted in his 2023 memoir Spare that the rule of thumb is “just a motto.” In other words? Whether it’s through direct quotes from the royals themselves or eagle-eyed internet sleuths analyzing body language frame by frame, the truth eventually comes out.
Featuring fresh reporting from royal correspondent Russell Myers’s new book William & Catherine: The Intimate Inside Story, we have details about Meghan Markle and Kate Middleton’s relationship, from first impressions to where they stand today. Read on to learn everything we know.
Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more royals, cleaning, humor, travel, tech and fun facts all week long.
What did Kate think of Meghan when they met?
The two women’s relationship was stilted from the very beginning, according to Myers. He writes that when they met for the first time in January 2017, Kate found Meghan to be “overly-friendly” and had a “touch of California” to her—which isn’t a compliment, by the way.
Meghan more or less confirmed the vibe in Harry & Meghan, recalling that she shocked William and Kate when she greeted them with a hug: “I was a hugger. I’ve always been a hugger, I didn’t realize that that is really jarring for a lot of Brits.”
She also mentioned that she was casually dressed (“in ripped jeans and I was barefoot”), while Harry later wrote in Spare that Kate had been “dressed to the nines.” Meghan said it didn’t take long for her to realize royal formality wasn’t just for public appearances.
“I guess I started to understand very quickly that the formality on the outside carried through on the inside,” she explained. “There is a forward-facing way of being … but that formality carries over on both sides. And that was surprising to me.” Still, it wasn’t all bad at the beginning. William and Kate were reportedly fans of Meghan’s legal drama Suits, and Meghan gifted Kate a Smythson notebook as a way to break the ice.
What was their initial relationship like?
It was a bit mixed. As the two couples gradually started spending more time together, the ice looked as if it was beginning to thaw. And when Harry and Meghan announced their engagement in November 2017, Kate said that she and William were “absolutely thrilled” about the “exciting news.”
But in the weeks leading up to the couple’s wedding on May 19, 2018, tensions reportedly surfaced. A disagreement during Princess Charlotte’s dress fitting (the then-3-year-old was a bridesmaid) became tabloid fodder and left the bride-to-be in tears. But: “She brought me flowers and a note apologizing,” Meghan recounted to Oprah in a 2021 tell-all interview, suggesting that the two had buried the hatchet.
Harry also wrote in Spare about a separate moment in which Meghan joked that Kate—who had given birth to Prince Louis just a month prior—must have “baby brain” after she forgot a minor wedding-related detail. Kate reportedly did not take the comment lightly, and Myers writes that she found Meghan “abrasive.”
These incidents hinted at cultural differences and clashing communication styles that would later deepen under global scrutiny.
What was the moment that changed everything?
After their wedding, Meghan and Harry settled into royal life and welcomed their son, Archie, in May 2019. Kate and William, meanwhile, were raising three young children of their own. Though the couples occasionally appeared together publicly, their lives continued to go in different directions.
The real turning point came in January 2020, when Harry and Meghan announced they were abdicating their responsibilities as working royals and leaving England for California. After Megxit, things only got worse.
A year later, during the Oprah interview, Meghan talked about her experiences in the royal family. Though she ultimately described Kate as “a good person” during the interview, according to Myers, “William and Catherine were both wounded by the numerous accusations and the presentation of Harry and Meghan’s ‘truth’.”
But, the nail in the proverbial coffin? That came after Harry detailed conflicts with his older brother in his explosive memoir. Their already-strained relationship deepened into a full-blown feud—and they’ve barely spoken since. Thus, any relationship between their wives was inadvertently severed as well.
What’s their relationship like today?
It’s safe to say that Meghan and Kate don’t currently have a relationship at all.
The last time they were seen publicly together was Sept. 10, 2022, two days after Elizabeth’s death at age 96. Accompanied by William and Harry, the two women walked side-by-side outside Windsor Castle to regard the floral tributes left in the queen’s memory.
They also attended the state funeral at Westminster Abbey on Sept. 19, 2022, followed by the Committal Service at St. George’s Chapel. (Notably, they did not sit together, instead positioned behind or apart from one another.) Since then, there have been no joint appearances.
For now, any potential reconciliation between Meghan and Kate won’t happen until their husbands repair their relationship first.
RELATED:
- Royal Scoop! Queen Elizabeth Kept a Secret Stash of This Sweet Treat in the Palace
- You’re Never Going to Believe the Perk That Prince Andrew Still Gets to Keep After Being Stripped of His Title
- Royal Rules! Prince William’s Hobby Is Actually Illegal in His New Community—Here’s How Much Trouble He Could Get in for It
Why trust us
Reader’s Digest has published hundreds of stories on the British royal family, providing a behind-the-scenes look at the fascinating facets of the monarchy. We regularly cover topics including the latest royal news, the history and meaning behind time-honored traditions, and the everyday quirks of everyone’s favorite family members, from Queen Elizabeth’s daily snack to Prince William’s confessions about his home life. We’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.
Sources:
- William & Catherine: The Intimate Inside Story by Russell Myers
- Spare by Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex
- Netflix: “Harry & Meghan”
- YouTube: “CBC News: The National; Meghan and Harry’s Oprah interview”
- Marie Claire: “Princess Kate’s Three-Word Assessment of Meghan Markle After Their First Meeting”
- Time: “What Broke Harry and Meghan’s Relationship With William and Kate, According to Spare”
- Standard: “The gift Meghan Markle brought Kate Middleton the first time they met”
- Marie Claire: “Meghan Markle has only kind words to say about Kate Middleton: ‘If you love me, you don’t have to hate her’”
- Hello!: “Everything Princess Kate has said about her sister-in-law Meghan Markle”
- BuzzFeed News: “Here Are 20 Headlines Comparing Meghan Markle To Kate Middleton That May Show Why She And Prince Harry Left Royal Life”
