35 Rock Puns You Won’t Take for Granite
Updated: Jan. 31, 2024
We're about to rock your world!
Science totally rocks, but you don’t need a PhD to appreciate these rock-solid geology puns. If you were one of those kids who played with rocks all the time—or had your own little collection—then this selection of stone puns is for you. Bask in the hilarity of geology, the great outdoors, and all things stony with these fun puns. Though if you want chemistry jokes or math jokes, we’ll have to direct you elsewhere, as this is strictly for those who want to rock out with funny puns.
Not to get too sedimental, but we’re so excited to share these with you that we might shed a tear or two—from laughter, of course! When you’re done mining this list for the best rock puns for a good laugh, click on over to these dinosaur jokes and biology jokes that are so funny, they cell themselves.
Funny Rock Puns & One-liners
1. Geologists love music, but their playlists get boring—they’re only rock and roll.
2. Not to quarry—you’ll do great on your science exam!
3. I’m coal as a cucumber!
4. This book about rocks is a fascinating pebble-cation.
5. May the quartz be with you!
6. Beach rocks are so cheap because they’re always on shale.
7. Did you hear about the drunk geologist? He finally hit rock bottom.
8. Be patient with geologists—they all have their faults.
9. My rock collection has so much sedimental value.
10. Power to the pebble!
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11. I may be obsessed with rocks, but that’s my pre-rock-ative.
12. You know the old saying—igneous is bliss.
13. It’s a hard rock life for us.
14. I’m going to look for gems this weekend, and I may need your assi-stones.
15. The geologist was found guilty in a quartz of law.
16. The tectonic plates just couldn’t maintain a relationship—there was too much friction between them.
17. A tour of a volcano would really magma day.
18. A geologist’s favorite fruit is the pome-granite.
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19. I want to make an impact on the world—I do things for the crater good of humanity.
20. It takes a boulder person to read through this list of puns.
21. There’s no halfway with a geologist—it’s all ore nothing.
22. A geologist’s favorite restaurant is the Hard Rock Cafe.
23. I’ve had a rough day, but I don’t want to chalk about it.
24. Did you see the geologist towing a crate of rocks behind his car? He had a wide lode sign.
25. The new geology teacher hasn’t had it easy—he got off to a rocky start.
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26. Sherrock Holmes’ famous line is: “Sedimentary, my dear Watstone.”
27. I’ll never take you for granite.
28. Whatever you do, always keep your coal.
29. I lava you so much!
30. That rock was magma before it was cool, know what I mean?
31. Oh, you were looking for rock jokes? Let’s see what we can dig up.
32. A geologist’s favorite drink is anything on the rocks.
33. The miner got sick of his job because it was just boring.
34. I’m not really hungry—I’ve lost my apatite.
35. You didn’t think these were good puns? Of quartz they were!
36. Have a gneiss day.
37. What do you call a criminal rock? Scum of the Earth.
38. Who is a geologist’s favorite band? The Rolling Stones.
39. What should you do when you hear a joke about rocks? Take it with a grain of basalt.
40. When were rock puns funniest? During the stone age.
41. Why are geologists no fun at parties? They like to be stone-cold sober.
42. What did the stone want to be when it grew up? A rock star.
43. What do you call a rock that never goes to school? A skipping stone!
44. Why was the sedimentary rock extra cheap? Because it was on shale.
45. Why did the miner stop digging? He was stuck between a rock and a hard place.
46. What do you call a dubious rock? A shamrock.
47. Why did the geologist go on a date to the quarry? He wanted to be a little boulder
48. What did Sherlock Holmes say when Watson asked what type of rock he was holding? “Sedimentary, my dear Watson.”
49. I think I got the schist of it.
50. What did the metamorphic rock grunt during the exam? This is too much pressure.
51. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Geode. Geode who? Geode bless you!
52. A geologist’s favorite move is Pyrites of the Caribbean.
53. What do rocks eat? Pom-a-granites/
54. Rock climbers do hard work. Don’t they Everest?
55. Why did the geologist quit his job? Because he wanted to start on a clean slate.
56. Why did the rock take English lessons? To help it talk boulder.
57. What do you do with dead geologists? You barium.
58. Geologists are great at rockin’ out.
59. Geography is cool, but Geology rocks.
60. What did the young rock say about failing his tests?   I don’t want to talc about it.
61. Why was the gemstone scared for his exams? Because he thought he wasn’t going topaz.
These rock puns are real gems, don’t you think? Keep the laughs going with the funniest bee puns worth buzzing about.
Originally Published: April 24, 2021
