25 Hilarious Animal Names That Are Way Better Than the Real Ones
Honestly, someone get me in touch with the CEO of naming things.
Let me upgrade you
Did anyone consult with the animals prior to naming them? Imagine being called a sea ravioli while other animals get to be called things like "sable" and "lynx." What kind of perverse name lottery is this?
Peacock: God’s favorite
Imagine your defining characteristic as an animal being that you are just so beautiful? Like that’s just your thing? It’s like peacocks showed up refreshed and chipper at 7 a.m. at the beauty store while everyone else stumbled in tired and hungover. That's why they're allowed to just roam all over zoos and the other animals can't. Here are 10 of the craziest things zookeepers have seen on the job.
Armadillo: Possums on the half shell
Do you know how hermit crabs outgrow their shells and scuttle nude to find a new one? That’s what possums do with oyster shells to evolve into armadillos. That being said, DO NOT EAT THEM!
Crinoid: Fashion fern
Crinoids may be in the starfish family, but they’ll be damned if starfishes are the only stars in this fish family. These things glamourous and they will let you know it.
Horseshoe crab: Ocean Roomba
These things are just scooting around the ocean floor: *vroooooooom* *bonk* *swivel*.
Kangaroo: Hop pocket
Did you hear the lady singing the tune from the commercial as you read this?