The Funniest Amazon Reviews of All Time
The reviews tend to be a lot more honest than the actual product description. Sometimes, they can be pretty hilarious too.
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Worked like a charm
Accouterments does it again
“I bought the Bacon v. Tofu toys on the advice of my psychiatrist, who recommended that I physically act out to resolve my lingering conflict between eating healthy, which my mom wanted me to do, and gorging unrepentantly on food products comprised of 95 percent animal fat, like I wanted to do. After 8 short months of bashing Bacon and Tofu together in the bath, I have resolved my inner conflict and released my food hangups. The key is that neither Bacon nor Tofu wins. They have to learn to co-exist peacefully together.” —via Amazon/customer review/R. Jason
“My family does a white elephant Christmas gift exchange every year. The price of gifts is limited to $20. I am going to buy this watch, if I can sell my house, and pretend that it only costs $10. The look on the person’s face that opens this gift will be priceless! He/she will be begging someone to take it from them so they don’t get stuck with it! I really hope my Uncle Steven gets it. I will wait until I know that he has thrown the watch away in anger, thinking that someone just bought him a $10 gift, before I finally fess up that it cost me almost $90,000! This will be awesome! Thanks, Satan for selling your watch!” —via Amazon/customer review/BC
World’s best sponges
“If I could give these sponges a million stars I would. I love them so much I couldn’t even bring my self to use them. I drew faces on them, they are now my friends and I have a little over 40 sponges! I am soon ordering more. I LOVE THESE SPONGES! They are a gift from God!” —via Amazon/customer review/Juliennes. The weirdest things you can buy on Amazon probably also have some really great reviews.
Better than it looks online
“Love this! I hate my wife’s cat but it made my wife pretty happy that the cat can come into our bedroom at will now and claw the dogs while they sleep. I installed this in just a few minutes, threw some Woodglue on to reinforce it, dried it for a few hours … boom it’s sturdy and gets the job done. I hate that cat but his door is pretty cool.” —via Amazon/customer review/Rachel Ayn & Noel
A real lifesaver
“This was a lifesaver during that time I was left for dead whilst hiking the Appalachian Trail. My “friends” abandoned me when I was engrossed in the latrine building. I was near starvation when I recalled my lucky pizza pouch hanging invitingly from my neck. I was able to ration bites from my mushroom, pepper, and onion well done supplemental slice until help arrived. I wasn’t even hungry when they brought me back to civilization.” —via Amazon/customer review/Amazon Customer. These hilarious photos will also give you a lot of laughs.