A mushroom walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender tells him to get out. The mushroom says, “Why? I’m a fun-guy.”
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How do you keep a bagel from getting away?
Put lox on it.
Did you hear about the cell phones that got married?
The wedding was terrible, but the reception was terrific.
Red sky at night, shepherd’s
delight. Blue sky at night, day.
Humorist Tom Parry
How does Moses make tea?
Q: What’s a shepherd’s favorite style of beer?
Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?”
Because every play has a cast.
Did you hear the one about the mime who went shopping? He only bought unmentionables.—Contributed by James Brink
A penguin walks into a bar, goes to the counter, and asks the bartender, “Have you seen my brother?”
The bartender says, “I don’t know. What does he look like?”