Q: How many carnivores does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They prefer to stay in the dark!
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Every time I make plans to eat better, I can hear my stomach laughing.
Never go back for seconds… get it all the first time.
Why spend $80 on a swimsuit when you can buy 320 chicken nuggets.
The most fattening thing that you can put in an ice cream sundae is the spoon.
Q: How many vegetarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: I don’t know, but where do you get your protein!?
I know it’s three meals a day, but how many should I eat at night?
My snack got lost in my purse, so I guess I’m on a diet now.—@msgweni
I’m not fat, but I’m not thin either. I’m at a point where you can definitely tell I like chocolate cake.